Come and get it before the YouTube gods take it away

If you’re in the mood for schoolboy defending, ropey team selection booing crowds, you could do a lot worse than watching the video above.

Setanta Sports 1, 8pm, Free £30 bet here

That old Italian man with the trendy specs may have made an unpopular choice in his permanent captain, but that doesn’t matter: England will send the Czechs back to that tiny landlocked republic they call home empty handed tomorrow night. Here’s why…

1. England are unbeaten in their last five meetings with the Czech Republic, winning four and drawing the other.

2. Czech Republic have never managed to beat England at Wembley, losing five and drawing one of their six previous contests on English soil.

3. Capello’s men

England/ Czech Republic, Wednesday, 8pm, Free £30 bet here

England friendlies are nearly always dreadful, but that doesn’t stop the preemptive wave of excitement - even when they are inconveniently scheduled during the opening week of the season.

Capello’s squad selection for his final friendly before World Cup Qualifying was hardly inspiring: the Italian leant towards the same players again, with Ashley Young inexplicably absent and hints about Darren Bent’s inclusion coming to nothing. But of the players named in the squad, who deserves to start?

Here’s what we think:

Joe Hart
We know what David James can do so there’s no need for him to play and of Joe Hart and Paul Robinson, the former is more worthy of being given the chance. The Manchester City player made a quiet debut in the second half against Trinidad and Tobago in June, but a better judgement could be made if he plays a full match against stronger opposition.

Matthew Upson
The Spoiler would prefer to see Upson or Woodgate start in central defence alongside the new England captain to test some new partnerships but Capello is almost certain to go with Ferdinand and Terry together. So as we’ve all seen plenty of Cashley, why not try Upson on the left over Chelsea reserve Wayne Bridge to give England another option?

Rio Ferdinand
Hopefully the Man United defender will be leading

Fortunately he didn’t have access to a golf club

In news that will undoubtedly rock the foundations of the football community, Craig Bellamy has been accused of abusing a female fan during last night’s 5-3 friendly win over Ipswich:

Bellamy was substituted with a leg injury halfway through the first half and, as he limped off, the £7million star became embroiled in a war of words.

The fan instantly reported the player’s outburst to a nearby police officer. Suffolk police spokesman Mark Norman said: “Officials of Ipswich and West Ham are both aware that an incident has taken place.” It overshadowed a thrilling night of football at Portman Road.

Allegedly the striker, who has already been in trouble with the fuzz in the closed season for going to town on a charity worker, was goaded by a female fan as he left the field. He said: “F*cking Ipswich prostitutes.” It’s very easy to lambast the tattooed Welshman for his outburst, but that’s quite a witty off-the-cuff retort for a man with whose idea of a good time is racially aggravated assault.

Celtic better watch out tomorrow night

Yesterday, The Spoiler boldly claimed that Darren Bent wouldn’t reach a goal tally in the double digits next season, as we presumed Juande Ramos would find someone to push him out of the regular team. The former Charlton top scorer, however, has managed to net seven goals in friendlies against Norwich (see above) and Leyton Orient this week, and it’s looking likely that he will be getting more of a run out when the season proper begins.

Have we and the mainstream media been too hasty in labelling him a flop? Will Bent silence his critics and stick away 20+ goals in Robbie Keane’s absence in the new term? Or will he still prove expensive and not particularly good in 2008/09?

Let us know what you think with a comment below…

Striker fails to trim down during summer of excess

It’s obviously a slow news day, as the two big stories in the papers are Rio Ferdinand’s Stamford Bridge steward kicking incident (which happened three months ago) and Wayne Rooney’s expanding waistline. The Sun claim the Manchester Utd striker’s summer of laying stagnant in a pool, emerging only to drink and eat fast food, has had a serious effect on his physique. He looked a bit portly in a friendly against Aberdeen this weekend, but wasn’t he always a little more rotund than is desirable for a professional footballer?

If you want to see a striker who has really been piling it on, check out this guy:

Ronaldo, whose contract with AC Milan ended two weeks ago, is pictured testing the tensile strength of a yacht in Ibiza. It looks like he and pregnant WAG Bia Anthony are really enjoying the local cuisine…

England’s second string expose schoolboy defending

Of all the things to keep a person up past their bedtime, a meaningless international friendly on a terrible surface against a laughably bad side ranks pretty low. Fortunately, I took the plunge, and even backed a 3-0 win at odds of 15-2, making the lost slumber all the more bearable. If you didn’t catch it, here’s the video highlights courtesy of 101 Great Goals.

(And if you fancy being as lucky and fabulously handsome as myself, check out chickendinner’s Euro 2008 betting guide.)

Fabio ‘happy’ with boring loss

Given the French squad absences and the fact that Scotland were able to come away from the Stade de France last September with a victory, I had high hopes for a credible performance last night. Imagine my disappointment upon watching saw a lacklustre side who, with the possible exception of David Beckham, looked as if they simply couldn’t be bothered. Heads dropped when the goal went in, passing was poor and players like Gerrard were virtually anonymous.

Despite the uninspiring show, Fabio still insisted he was ‘happy’ with the performance. Either his translator failed to detect any sarcasm in his tone, or the bespectacled boss is seeing something I didn’t.

Enjoy the highlights auf Deutsch and leave your comments below.