Today’s gossip, rumours and damned lies

The maths genii at The Daily Star are ahead of the game once more, reporting that if Liverpool cave and pay £18 million for Barry, Villa will use the money to sign David Bentley (who last time we heard was valued at £15 million alone), Anton Ferdinand and Steve Sidwell. And apparently there’s spare change from all that to buy a new keeper too. The Spoiler’s calculator puts that shopping list somewhere around the £30million mark….

Emmanuel Adebayor to Barcelona
Once upon a time Arsenal signed Nicolas Anelka for £500,000 then sold him for £22.3 million two years later. It looks like Arsene Wenger will be rich again as Barcelona have reportedly offered £30 million for top scorer Adebayor.

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: An offer perhaps too good to turn down

Roque Santa Cruz to Arsenal

Wenger already has a replacement lined up, probably for less than half of the money they can make on Adebayor. Paul Ince has said Cruz will stay put, but Arsenal are ready to test Blackburn’s resolve.

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: Blackburn will drive a hard bargain

Dimitar Berbatov to Man United
Real Madrid have generously

Today’s gossip, rumours and damned lies

Gareth Barry is still working on his ‘Mr Popular’ reputation by getting himself banned from Aston Villa’s training ground. According to The Times, he is reluctant to put in an official transfer request as he will miss out on loyalty payments. And who is more deserving of loyalty payments than the man who has insisted that he wants to leave his current employers high and dry?

Elsewhere, Arsene Wenger is leading the race to see the spectacle of Andrei Arshavin sign a contract while looking in the opposite direction, and it will cost The Gunners around £15m for the privilege…

Emmanuel Adebayor to Barcelona
AC Milan conceded defeat in the pursuit of the Arsenal striker yesterday, but Barca have upped their bid.

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: His head may have been turned

Andrei Arshavin to Arsenal
If Barca break the bank for Adebayor, then maybe they won’t need Arshavin, leaving Arsenal to replace the Togolese striker and have some money to spare.

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: Chelsea may also bid - Abramovich has allegedly demanded a Russian.

Samuel Eto’o/ Florent Malouda exchange
Malouda is officially a flop after one season, and at Chelsea you rarely get a second chance.

Todays rumours, gossip and damned lies

According to the Daily Mirror, Inter Milan have agreed a fee of £7 million to finally separate Lamps’ lips from his beloved Chelsea badge and bring him to the San Siro. For those of you wondering, that’s approximately 39 per cent of a Gareth Barry at today’s market value…

The Gareth Barry saga latest
Martin O’Neill has asked for a whopping £18 million, but Liverpool insist they won’t go beyond a pathetic £17 million. (That would be the same Liverpool who reportedly rejected a £9 million offer for Peter Crouch from Portsmouth as it was a million short of their demand.)

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: If you’re willing to pay 17, why not go one more? It’s not like there’s a recession at the moment or anything…

Ronaldinho to Chelsea
If Lampard leaves then Chelsea will have to move quickly to fill their tubby quota. They will be delighted to hear that podgy Barca man Ronaldinho wants to work with Scolari again.

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: He wants to go, but do Chelsea want him?

Robert Green to Aston Villa
Villa are moving lower down the

An entire team of gentlemen looking for a new employer

The transfer window is now wide open, and there are countless players itching to increase their fortunes by kissing the crest of a new club. Here’s eleven of the greediest best…

Scott Carson
Liverpool are so fed up with Carson that they would rather bring in a shiny new reserve keeper like Antti Niemi. Aston Villa chucked him too, so Scott is simply begging for someone to pick him up.

Potential suitors: Middlesbrough, West Brom

Nicky Shorey
This time last year, Shorey was strutting his stuff in the England squad and was supposedly the apple of West Ham’s eye. He stayed aboard the Good Ship Reading and watched it capsize in May, and now wants another taste of the Premier League.

Potential suitors: West Ham, Portsmouth, Aston Villa, Newcastle

Anton Ferdinand
The younger Ferdinand has gone from being charged with assault to becoming one of the most sought-after defenders in the Premier League. It’s hard to see Joey Barton’s transformation going that smoothly.

Potential suitors: Tottenham, Aston Villa, Newcastle

Richard Dunne
They don’t bother voting for Man City’s player of the year any more because this guy wins all the time. Dunne was upset with Sven’s sacking and eager to leave, though rumours suggest Mark Hughes may have talked him round.

Potential suitors: Portsmouth, Tottenham, West Ham, Aston Villa, Newcastle

Pascal Chimbonda
Juande Ramos employed subtle techniques to let the Frenchman know he isn’t wanted, like signing two new players in his position months after taking over. But if you cast aside his idiotic tendencies, Chimbonda is a talented

All the latest transfer rumours, gossip and damn lies

The mire of spurious summer transfers has thrown up an interesting player/ club combination today: according to the rumour vine, Andriy Shevchenko could be on his way to warming Barcelona’s bench in the near future. To compensate for selling approximately 57 attacking players this summer, Barca want to bring the Ukrainian in on a season-long loan, which means they pay no transfer fee but Chelsea get him off the wage bill. With the Milan option fading, he may just have to take this one.

Emmanuel Adebayor to Chelsea
New stories every day tell us the same stuff about Ronaldo, Ronaldinho and Drogba, so it’s nice to see the press get more inventive. Chelsea want shot of Drogba and it seems they view Adebayor as the perfect replacement.

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: Surely he won’t do an Ashley Cole

Robbie Keane to Liverpool
Could a (reasonably) big club have finally realised Robbie Keane is one of the best strikers in the Premier League and that despite Berbatov’s moments of brilliance, Keane works harder and is more consistent?

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: May want to stick around at Spurs this season

Gareth Barry to Liverpool
One transfer saga that definitely looks

If Wenger doesn’t need new defenders, then what does he need?

While Tottenham have got to work early and spent big on Luka Modric and Giovani dos Santos, Arsenal are still on the starting blocks, with the first sign of any transfer activity at the Emirates being quickly shot down by Arsene Wenger:

“I have been interested in Vincent Kompany ever since he was 16, but I am not interested in him this year. There is nobody I need for my team’s defensive department.”

Which of course prompts the question: what’s the point of tracking someone for six years if you have no intention to signing them? By acting much like a flirtatious girl who makes you believe she’s the one but who will quickly break your heart, perhaps Arsene is telling us he simply enjoys the thrill of the chase.

Anyway, Arsenal’s reticence to invest has spurred The Spoiler to consider where each London club needs to improve next season.

So we did a think and then gone wrote it down:

Chelsea

Top priority:
Flair players - Big Phil hasn’t just been brought to Chelsea to win trophies, he’s expected to bring some Brazilian flair to the job and make the Blues exciting to watch as well as being scarily efficient.

Fitting the bill: Ronaldinho, Kaka, Franck Ribery

Arsenal

Top priority:
Depth in midfield - Diarra then Flamini have gone, Hleb’s inconsistent, Rosicky’s injured, Gilberto’s past his best and Fabregas got tired last year so it’s clear that Arsenal need to bolster their midfield, and potentially bring in a new keeper.

Fitting the bill: Gareth Barry, Samir Nasri, Hatem Ben Arfa, Bastian Schweinsteiger

West Ham

Top priority:
New medical team/left-winger - Take away the dozen injuries West Ham had for most of last season and they’ve got perhaps the biggest squad in the league.

The left wing is a problem though: the fans turned on Boa Morte and he wants out while Etherington is always injured.

Fitting the bill: Stephen Hunt, Damien Duff, Pablo Aimar

Tottenham

Top priority:
New goalkeeper and striker

‘Marcus’ embraces the blogging spirit, and then some

Aside from a nice cold beer on a hot Christmas morning, nothing makes The Spoiler staff happier than a well thought-out constructive comment on a story. So imagine our delight when we saw this lengthy effort from Villa fan Marcus, expressing his utter dismay over the current Gareth Barry transfer saga. We may or may not agree with you, but you are a credit to the blogosphere, chap:

Dear Gareth & your agent,

Before you confuse your career needs with your emotional and irrational desire to play with your mate Stevie in the odd Champions League game, you might like to consider this.

Hicks and Gillett hate each other. The club has their debt incurred acquiring the club. They have already refinanced and the club pays interest of £30m a year. Accounts of Kop Holdings Ltd (set up to run the club) show a loss of £32.3m in the last year, despite reaching the Champions League final. The duo had to draw £1.5m to cover their ‘personal expenses’, hardly something rich men need to do. The duo have still not obtained finance for the new stadium. If they have not got it now, they will not get it. They have no capital worth talking about, the world is already suffering the ‘credit crunch’ and is about to go into recession.

Villa is totally stable and improving.

If the Reds have to sell to buy, they will have to do it again next season. Does any other Champions League club have to do that? Eventually they will run out of players. Are Man U, Chelsea or Arsenal interested in Milner? How long before

Today’s transfer gossip, assessed and dissected just for you

Precious little Alex Hleb last month claimed his sensitive eardrums couldn’t handle the bustle of urban life in London, and he now seeks a more serene atmosphere. If the rumours of a move to Barcelona are true, however, he will find anything but the peace and quiet he seeks: in the Catalan city, honking at all hours is considered a national pastime, shouting is the preferred method of communication and the bars are completely full of loutish British stag parties every weekend. Enjoy the relative calm of London while you can, Alex.

Alex Hleb to Barcelona or maybe Bayern Munich
The honeymooning star has been linked with absolutely everyone in the past few weeks, even Rushden and Diamonds have a shot at landing him. His agent says: “The only transfer Alexander is making at the moment is from the hotel to the beach and back.”

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: He’ll be linked to AC or Roma tomorrow

Gareth Barry to Liverpool
Those Real Madrid-esque bullies, using Steven Gerrard as bait, have finally turned Barry’s head and the Villa captain has told his club he wants out. Liverpool are expected to up their offer today.

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: Seems likely now

Justin Hoyte to Aston Villa
A miserable day for Villa fans may get worse if they sign Arsenal’s other Englishman. You know, the guy that plays even less than Theo Walcott and sometimes gets in the Arsenal League Cup team.

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: If it gets any bleaker, O’Leary will be back!

Luis Felipe Scolari to Chelsea
“Big Phil” has revealed

All of today’s rumours, translated from Portuguese

Well done Chelsea - after striking the fear of God into everyone for ages, the mask appears to have slipped. Roman didn’t get his wish of a winning final in Russia, all the best managers are giving them a wide berth, and what are the chances of Lampsie, the Drog-man, and even snarling Mikey Essien heading out east to lick pasta sauce from Mourinho’s chin next season? Pretty high, many would argue. And, it doesn’t end there…

Ashley Cole to Inter Milan
Mourinho had quite some effect on the Chelsea players, a bit like Robin Williams in Dead Poets Society - you know, where the young boys find rebellion through poetry? Heart wrenching film, that one. Williams doesn’t crack a single gag. Anyway, in a similar vein, Ashley Cole might move towards Mourinho, if people waft enough money stink his way.

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: Time to alienate Italy, Ashley?

Aston Villa to help out children’s hospice

A huge pat on the back is due for Randy Lerner and co for defying the Premiership trend to ‘maximise revenues’. Instead of renewing their shirt sponsorship deal with a large corporation, the West Midlands club have taken a leaf from Barcelona’s book by giving their shirt sponsorship deal to a charity.

Villa have forsaken up a potential £2million deal in order to help out the Acorns children’s hospice, in a move that has made Martin O’Neill ‘very proud’. Awww.

Financial cynics shouldn’t be too concerned by this philanthropic turn, as the constantly inflating Gareth Barry sale price (now at around £15million) and the 7.5 per cent hike in season ticket prices should cover the opportunity cost.