Some terribly childish fun with the Match of the Day team

[Pies]

Tigers star tells compatriot Scolari that he’s going down

Excluding the final two games of the 2005-06 season when Chelsea had already won the title, the Blues haven’t lost consecutive Premier League games since March 2003 but Hull’s attacking midfielder Geovanni is certain that Hull will beat them tomorrow. He said:

“Big clubs should be wary of us because we are going to continue to surprise them.

“Chelsea will be next after Arsenal. The Blues have a tremendous squad but they just lost to Liverpool, which is a blow for their morale, so let’s take advantage of it.

“Scolari is a top coach and I do not doubt he will be a success at Chelsea, but I feel sorry for him because we are going to beat his team.”

Is Geovanni right? Will Gary Lineker again be forced to patronisingly congratulate tiny Hull on Match of the Day tomorrow night? Let us know what you think with a comment below.

Kelly Brook, Danielle Bux

We don’t need to tell you that Danielle Bux and Kelly Brook are beautiful women, it’s all there for you to see. One sultry, with smoky eyes, and hands still slippery from rubbing oil into Gary Lineker’s tanned thighs. The other cheerful and bosomy, because she’s just spent the evening getting off with Danny Cipriani in front of Hollyoaks. In fact, both girls have felt the Cipriani breath in their ears at some point, but which one is hotter?

Over on our sister site, Polite Applause, the rugby/golf/tennis fans can’t separate them. Can you? Click here to cast your votes.

Who saw this one coming?

Ever since Des Lynam slid into obscurity, only occasionally peeking above the bedsheets to host Countdown, the nation has been wondering whether Lineker will ever have the right quota of syrupy smoothness to truly replace him on MOTD. Yes, he has the oily legs, and the silver-fox hairstyle, but is he sexy enough? Judging by last night, watching a saluting Des and his busty woman sashaying up the red carpet for the Pride of Britain awards, the answer is “nope”. Not yet.

As for Gary’s lover, Danielle Bux, she would be wise to look at Lynam’s missus for tips on how to look terrifically sassy at an awards ceremony. Yes, people, that is a woman of a certain age sporting something a little bit see-through. Fantastic!

Lineker’s favourite lady strips down for Maxim… 

She’s the WAG that just won’t quit. It’s been a busy week for Gary Lineker’s latest sexual partner, Danielle Bux, what with wedding plans, opening up knicker shops, and now this - a massive spread in gentleman’s favourite Maxim.

See how the saucy shoot ended up after the jump…

This woman is BUSY…

Only yesterday we were tipped off that Lineker’s latest bed partner had been zipping around the shops arranging her important marriage to Sir Gary, so you’d assume that today would be spent in bed - exhausted. But no, this is one WAG that never stops. She was up at the crack of dawn ritually smearing oil into Gary’s legs, before heading into London to open a lingerie shop called La Senza. Phew!

See what girls in knickers look like after the jump…

While everyone’s been distracted by the Tevez stuff, things have happened…

If anyone is proof that being a footballer makes your life tremendous, it’s Owen Hargreaves. Such a straight-faced young midfielder, were he not brilliant at sport, he has the look of a man who would mumble profanities about his boring office job, and down pints at the weekend until he was set to pass out. As it is, he gets to play for Man United, and when he’s not doing that he’s sprawled naked on satin sheets with only Zabeena Harris (pictured) for company. She is a present day model, who has been seen out and about in her pants (thanks Kickette). She’s his girlfriend.

Elsewhere in the world, Danielle Bux is getting all pumped up about her upcoming wedding to MOTD’s Ringo Starr look-a-like, Gary Lineker. A gaggle of grown men with big paparazzi cameras have been sprinting around after her as she makes various decisions about what gift demands she should make of her guests.

Witness the proof after the jump…

What have those WAGs been up to? You ask…

What with Theo Walcott suddenly morphing into the best player of all time, and England now totally guaranteed to win the World Cup, you’d almost forgotten about the WAGs, hadn’t you? Poor girls, out there in the real world, getting ignored. So thank Christ for The Spoiler, because our eyes of steel didn’t once shift focus to the footie.

The big news is that Danielle Bux (pictured above) did some photo shoot thing about a bus - she was joined by some girls in pink underpants. Carly Zucker was out getting some fresh veg and fizzy water in Waitrose as blood squirted from her boyfriend’s soft head on a field in Croatia. And former WAG Danielle Lloyd has seemingly given up on footballers altogether, and now only goes out with small men - or tall dwarfs.  Which one is it?

Catch up with Zucker and Lloyd after the jump…