See The Gers’ natty new threads right here

The unveiling of Rangers’ new sponsor is badly-timed, seeing as they will not be requiring the services of an official airline for at least another year…

Prem big boys flex their muscles in games that don’t really matter

This weekend, the Premier League’s finest took and some of the best clubs in Europe (and Glasgow Rangers) in some tasty pre-season action. Chelsea made AC Milan (and ex-Leicester) keeper Zeljko Kalac look like a damned chump in their 5-0 victory in Moscow, while Liverpool, Manchester Utd and Arsenal also notched up pre-season victories.

See more video highlights after the jump…

Rangers strikers can’t help but show their love for one another

During a 1996 Scottish FA Cup match between Rangers and Inverness Caledonian Thistle at Tannadice Park, Gazza and Ally McCoist accidentally clashed heads, giving the latter a burst lip. To make amends, Gazza decided to clash heads again, in order to “kiss it better” (his words, not mine).

Thanks to Scott for the excellent Sporno submission. If you have seen any sport/ porn hybrids out there, send them in and earn yourself a thousand shiny pennies.

Click here to see the full Sporno gallery

All of today’s transfer gossip in one neat package

Just last week, Chelsea were confident that they would be signing every big name player in the world - Torres, Ribery, Ronaldinho, Pele, Roy of the Rovers - but now their masterplan is starting to take an unexpected turn. Despite the severe lack of loyalty and pride in the English top flight, it seems that not everyone can be persuaded to switch teams with a huge briefcase of money…

David Villa to Real Madrid or Barcelona
It wasn’t long ago that Villa was declaring Arsenal his dream club, but upon hearing that Chelsea are chasing him, he is so desperate not to join them that he is begging to stay in Spain.

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: Straight from the free-scoring horse’s mouth

Robin van Persie to Inter Milan
The Dutchman has had a taste of what it feels like to be part of a winning side at Euro 2008 and apparently he’s hungry for more.

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: Depends if he gets a pay rise

Dimitar Berbatov to Barcelona
The amnesty on Berbatov transfer rumours

UEFA Cup Final, tonight, 7.45pm, ITV1, bet here

The last time Rangers played in a proper European final, in Barcelona against Dynamo Moscow in 1972, General Franco was still directing policing operations in Spain. Unfortunately for the old fascist, his forces of law and order found Rangers fans in a boisterous mood, as they celebrated their win by joining the players on the pitch before the game was over. The truncheons of the fat-bellied Guardia Civil were no match for the granite-headed protestants, and the soundly thrashed police were forced to beat a humiliating retreat, thus guaranteeing a warm welcome for all Scots in Barcelona for years to come. According to Graham Hunter, writing in Scotland’s Daily Herald, the referee in that game, one Sr. Ortiz, refutes the idea