The Spoiler

Drogba auditions for Casualty, Spiderman forgets his mask and a ten goal thriller


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Didier Drogba takes football theatrics to seizure-tastic new levels

Jonas ‘Spiderman’ Gutierrez finally scores… but leaves his Spidey mask in the dressing room
[The Sun]

Game of the weekend: Lyon 5 - Marseille 5
[101 Great Goals]

6 stadiums which have sold their souls - although ‘Bargain Booze Stadium’ conjures fond memories of The Spoiler’s student days
[Telegraph]

John Terry will now have a special chant for every member of his family
[News of the World]

Are Eboue and Sagna ready to quit Arsenal’s goal party?
[Caught Offside]

Wee Gordon Strachan thinks marriage is the key to Boro’s problems
[Off The Post]

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Posted: November 9th, 2009 by Richard Gilzene

Video: Gordon Strachan forgets he is on MOTD2


Scottish pundit whips out his Wenger-based comedy routine

A tip of the cap to 101GG, who have unearthed our favourite part of Sunday’s MOTD2.

Forgetting that he is live on a football show, Gordon Strachan appears to launch into an impromptu audition for Mock The Week. Watch out, Hugh Dennis!

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Posted: September 1st, 2009 by Ryan Bailey

Tony Adams puts himself in contention for the Celtic job


Unemployed manager tries to talk his way into the Parkhead post

Former Portsmouth boss Tony Adams

You’d think someone who relegated Wycombe and was ready to do the same with Portsmouth would struggle to land a League Two job* but Tony Adams frightened Celtic fans today by claiming he could succeed Gordon Strachan.

The legendary defender said he had been recommended by popular former boss Wim Jansen, who he worked with at Feyenoord. Despite not even applying, he seemed to expect to be considered ahead of candidates like Roberto Martinez, whose Swansea side knocked him out of the FA Cup.

In an attempt to explain why the job appealed to him, Adams didn’t offer the

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Posted: June 2nd, 2009 by Michael Lintorn

Alan Shearer is staying, Man United want Franck Ribery and Celtic consider Tony Mowbray


The latest transfer gossip, rumours and damned lies…

Alan Shearer

Alan Shearer will be offered a four-year contract
Joe Kinnear’s favourite journalist Simon Bird is reporting that Mike Ashley wants Alan Shearer to sign a four-year contract. The Geordie Messiah failed to pick up the six points from eight games needed to survive yet is still viewed as the ideal man to bring Newcastle back to the Premier League.

The Spoiler truth-o-meter: Ashley has pretty much botched every major decision he has had to make so it’s no surprise that he is willing to give an unproven manager a long-term deal just to appease the fans.

Franck Ribery to Manchester United
Patrice Evra has described his international teammate Franck Ribery as “the

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Posted: May 26th, 2009 by Michael Lintorn

Who would you prefer: Sam Allardyce or Alan Curbishley?


Former England contenders left begging for job with strugglers

Sam Allardyce, the favourite for the Sunderland job

Gordon Strachan, Avram Grant, Peter Reid and Co Adriaanse have all been thrust into contention to succeed Roy Keane at various points over the past week, before quickly fading away again. However, Sam Allardyce and Alan Curbishley have been constants, starting as the frontrunners in the betting last Thursday and remaining so up to now, which indicates that one of them will be the next manager of Sunderland. Both men have in common a track record for getting the best out of average players while being criticised for a dull brand of football, but beyond that, here’s what we consider both men’s pros and cons:

Sam Allardyce
+ Favours modern methods such as Prozone a lot more than Curbishley does
+ Has qualified for Europe with an unfancied team
+ Boasts a pretty impressive record in the transfer market

- His team’s direct physical approach hasn’t won over many neutrals
- Was sacked by Newcastle after a run of two wins in twelve games
- Do Sunderland really want somebody who flopped at their biggest rivals?

Alan Curbishley
+ Has never been sacked as a manager
+ Kept West Ham up from a far worse position than Sunderland are in now

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Posted: December 11th, 2008 by Michael Lintorn

Vote: Who should be the next Sunderland manager?


The race to replace Ol’ Grey Beard is on

Roy Keane

This morning Sunderland became a ship without a rudder as their warm-chinned gaffer stood down after a 27-month stint at the helm. There have been plenty of whispers about the next manager, some more ridiculous than others (Keeeeegan!), but one thing is clear: the longer they go without a strong leader, the bleaker the future looks.

Who would you like to see in charge at Le Stade du Light? Votes and comments below, please…

Special offer: Betting on the next Sunderland manager? Do it at Paddy Power and get a free £10 bet

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Posted: December 4th, 2008 by Ryan Bailey

The ‘fallen out with Alex Ferguson’ XI


Eleven men, all hated by one man

Sir Alex Ferguson

United players fall into two distinct camps: the ones Sir Alex will personally visit over Christmas for a cuddle - Giggs, Irwin, Solksjaer, Neville, Scholsie - and those he’ll spy on from a nearby tree, whispering profanities under his breath - Dwight Yorke, Becks, and now Cristiano Ronaldo. Ferguson does not tolerate certain characters, and as things stand, the gelled-up winger looks likely to be playing himself into this team of rebels, all of whom still send angry chills up Ferguson’s aging spine.

GK Jim Leighton
Leighton was riding the crest of a wave in his early Man United days, with even Brian Clough saying “Jim Leighton is a rare bird - a Scottish goalkeeper that can be relied on.” But then Sir Alex axed him from the 1990 FA Cup final replay against Palace, sending the keeper into a downward spiral, involving anger, shame, Les Sealey, and, eventually, Dundee.

DL Gabriel Heinze
The future was so bright for Heinze (pronounced “hent-zay” apparently) - United fans loved him, his hair was only second in footballing terms to Ginola’s. But then it all went hideously wrong. His body revolted, Ferguson embarked on a love affair with Patrice Evra, and Gabriel could no longer be guaranteed the satin starting shirt he so yearned for. He threw an almighty strop, and finally Ferguson bundled him in the direction of Real Madrid - simultaneously ignoring the clamour from Liverpool.

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Posted: August 5th, 2008 by Josh Burt