The latest transfer gossip, rumours and damned lies

Douglas Costa to Manchester Utd
The Times claim the Red Devils are moving closer to securing the services of Gremio’s highly-rated midfielder Douglas Costa. Despite being just 18, the Brazilian club are trying to get £20m for their free kick specialist.

The Spoiler truth-o-meter: That’s a helluva lot of cash for a teenager with twelve senior club appearances to his name. Surely this will only happen if Gremio lower their asking price.

Mirko Vucinic to Tottenham
‘Arry has been linked to the Roma forward for a few weeks, and Italian daily Il Tempo believe a €20m bid is on the immediate horizon. Roma are said to be in desperate need of cash, and the man who has perfected the stripping goal celebration may become a high profile sacrifice.

The words “banjo” and “cow’s backside” spring to mind

Last night’s Copa Libertadores clash between Brazilian side Gremio and Colombia’s Boyaca Chico will be remembered for nothing else except the devastatingly bad triple miss of Gremio attacking midfielder Jonas. Even Nicklas Bendtner would have put one of those away!

Spoiler bonus: Jonas may be feeling pretty sorry for himself, but he can always bask in the glory of getting a shout out at every single Weezer concert…

The sex tape star who held the Hand of God

Fans of yesterday’s WAG Zaira Nara will be pleased to see her sister Wanda featuring today. The Argentinean model hit headlines in 2006 after rumours of an affair with Diego Maradona - a rumour that she confirmed and he denied. Not long after, she contributed to the vast milieu of leaked internet sex tapes, which put an end to her well publicised reputation as a virgin.

Currently, she is married to former Barcelona and current Grêmio striker Maxi López.