Read what happens when football execs take charge of the entertainment

Last night’s PFA Gala dinner proved that life in the glamourous world of professional football isn’t all cheeseburgers and hookers - it’s also big suited money men making bad executive decisions about music.

For a ridiculous £5,000, excited guests turned up to their tables of ten, looking forward to some beautiful food crafted from the delicate hands of Paul Heathcote, a Bolton fan and top chef, followed by a night of jaw-dropping entertainment, courtesy of some hand-picked international “megastars”.

Some groups even stumped up a whopping £10,000 so that they could sit in the same area as these celebs and look on in silent awe as they quaffed delicious champagne and demanded more food be delivered at once.

But then the word “megastar” took a nasty turn.

Surely expecting Depp, Cruise, perhaps a little bit of Kravitz, the crowds were instead ‘treated’ to Jack Dee, John Christos (who?), and then the final insult - Simply Red.

Even Michael Owen, who wasn’t there and isn’t sure what kind of music he likes, would be completely disgusted. Presumably.

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