King Kev having crisis talks with board

BBC Radio Newcastle are reporting that Kevin Keegan is currently having crisis talks with the club’s hierarchy after becoming frustrated by the sale of first-team players.

There are rumours circulating that he may have walked already and King Kev is now a tiny 1.38 (approximately 4/11) on Betfair to be the first Premier League manager to leave their post.

Club signs Premier League’s most handsome man…

As the clock ticks ever closer to the slamming shut of the transfer window, clubs have decided it’s high time to start splurging money around like crazy folk. Make no mistake, James Milner is a decent player to have hurtling around for your side, but at £12 million, it screams of a panic buy. More importantly, who could he possibly dislodge from the team?

Thus far, no news on Barry suddenly repacking his suitcase.

The whisper from today’s knitting circles…

Peter Kenyon triumphantly told everyone that Robinho would arrive within 48 hours on Wednesday and Frank Lampard told the press that the Brazilian was “fantastic”, but then a couple of Real Madrid targets - Valencia’s David Villa and Villarreal’s Santi Cozorla – decided to stay put, so now it looks like the light-footed winger will be zooming down the wings in sunny Spain after all. Joe Cole - permission to stop sweating.

Henrik Larsson to Tottenham
Andrei Arshavin has conceded there is little chance of him moving to Spurs this summer, which leaves the North London club searching through the thousandth page of their striker shortlist. Henrik Larsson is today’s target, but Everton are also interested.

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: He’s 37 next month, but Spurs can’t afford to be too picky right now.

Another top player displays temperature issues

We’re barely ten days into the new season and already the weather is playing havoc with the ability of some of the more sensitive stars to perform their duties satisfactorily. Vidic says it’s too rainy. Savage says its too cold. Now Newcastle’s not-for-much-longer midfielder James Milner has joined the list.

Although he left Coventry’s Ricoh Arena with the Man of the Match champagne in his handbag on Tuesday, Milner wasn’t having anything to do with reporters eager to discover who he might be planning to share it with. Why the silence? Could Milner be another victim of this season’s weather madness?

In Lee Ryder’s Blog on the Tyne in yesterday’s Newcastle Chronicle, he describes a similar episode

Also appearing on a computer near you…

Yesterday evening, The Spoiler correctly predicted that Valencia’s refusal to sell David Silva to Man United would force Sir Alex Ferguson to up his Dimitar Berbatov bid. Reports today suggest that the Red Devils have thrust £28 million in Spurs’ direction. Will Spurs cave in and leave themselves open to ‘feeder club’ jibes again this close to kick-off? The latest whispers suggest Juande Ramos will be desperately trying to fill the gaping Bulgarian-shaped hole in his strikeforce within the next 24 hours.

James Milner to Aston Villa
A week ago Aston Villa looked to be in trouble. Martin O’Neill had all but conceded defeat in the Gareth Barry saga and nobody new was arriving. With Nicky Shorey, Luke Young and Carlos Cuellar, however, the skies are blue, the sun is shining, Barry is still there and Milner is ready to join.

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: Villa are signalling their intent to improve further on last season

Anton’s off again
Despite Anton Ferdinand saying he has no desire to leave

Today’s transfer gossip, as made up by the national press

When he isn’t pissing off Liverpool, growing face art or aggravating wealthy Americans, Liverpool boss Rafa Benitez enjoys nothing more than having kitchenware modelled on the shape of his cranium. The image above is from Wikipedia, so it must be true - much like the following speculation from sports desks around the country:

Yossi Benayoun to Everton
Twelve months ago Benayoun pledged to sign a new deal at West Ham before mysteriously being provoked into a change of heart. It looks like he’s fed up at Anfield now, but is he bored of Merseyside?

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: Everton call it “fantasy”, we’re not so sure either

James Milner to Liverpool
Aston Villa want Milner, but because they’re not letting Liverpool steal Gareth Barry without a fight, Benitez is pretending he wants Milner to hike his price up. Rafa, you big bully.

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: Could be the next Jermaine Pennant

Emmanuel Adebayor to AC Milan
The Italian press say Adebayor has told Arsenal he wants to leave. Can you blame him? After all he scored 30 goals this season and still failed to win over certain factions of the Gunners faithful.

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: Believes he’ll stay put

Kaka to Chelsea
Do the maths. Brazilian managers must sign the best Brazilian players, right? Scolari played

Trading in gossip and rumour is fun, kids

An international tournament is very nearly upon us which can only mean one thing: it’s time for Cristiano Ronaldo to piss off England. At the 2006 World Cup, the C-Ron Likeability-ometer took a Big Brother villain-esque plunge following his winking tactics, and after his recent disloyal comments and impending departure, the tricky winger’s popularity will experience a similar fall. Despite the inflated importance of the C-Ron debate, the rumour mills have been turning elsewhere…

James Milner to Liverpool
Really? Until recently it didn’t look like Rafa Benitez had even heard of English players let alone ones nowhere near getting into the national team.

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: We can just about believe Barry, but not Milner

Frank Rijkaard or Roberto Mancini to Chelsea
The Blues have decided that it might be a good idea to interview the only two guys that haven’t said no to the Chelsea job before they decide Blackburn might be a better option.

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: Definitely two of the frontrunners. Maybe.

Joe Lewis to Everton
It’s amazing what being part of the England squad can do to your valuation. Apparently Peterborough’s goalkeeper wasn’t just brought along for a laugh and is actually worth three million.

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: Have Everton even got three million?

Eidur Gudjohnsen to Newcastle or West Ham
Another transfer window opens and again Barcelona