Newcastle executive is a stand-up guy, according to himself

In case you didn’t know, Dennis Wise - the chap who Alex Ferguson said “could start a fight in an empty house” - is a thoroughly upstanding citizen who is adored by fans across the nation for his refusal to acquiesce to demands of the the money men. That is, according to the jacket of his 1999 autobiography:

In an age when football is dominated by glamorous foreign players chasing multi-million-pound contracts from club to club, Dennis Wise represents the traditions of team loyalty, dogged determination and fighting spirit.

It is perhaps this, as well as his charmingly irascible nature, that makes Dennis - Wisey to his teammates and fans - such an enduringly popular player.

‘Enduringly popular’? Leicester, Leeds and Newcastle fans would probably disagree…

Watch Mr B launch his career at Deepdale

Two seasons before he caught Wimbledon keeper Neil Sullivan off his line, David Beckham was sent to Lancashire to get some first team experience. He helped guide Preston North End to fifth place in the old Division Three, but returned to Manchester Utd in April of the 1994/95 season to debut in a goalless draw against Leeds.

None of these men are the new Pele…

Everyone makes mistakes. After all, wasn’t it someone at Channel 4 who once thought it a delightful idea to lock a beautiful Indian woman in a room with a mob of angry racists? That didn’t quite work out as hoped. Other bad ideas have included - the quarter pounder WITHOUT cheese, fingerless gloves, blind chainsaw practice, and Davina McCall. All of those, however, pale in comparison to this little lot. Terrible decisions the lot of them.

GK Richard Wright
Looked so good when he was hurling himself around at the back for Ipwswich, but then he went to Arsenal and Everton, and proved beyond any reasonable doubt that he wasn’t a very good goalkeeper. Now, he’s not really wanted at West Ham, but everyone’s too scared to tell him. That’s what happens when you’re tall, people just whisper behind your back.

DL Wayne Bridge
That he’s been at Chelsea since 2003, happy to play second fiddle to the world’s second most irksome figure (behind Mugabe), Ashley Cole, tells you everything you need to know about Wayne Bridge. He doesn’t really want to play football.

DC Jonathan Woodgate
Real Madrid thought him worthy of £13.4 million, then he scored an own goal and got a red card on his debut. If anything, it’s been downhill from there. Made of balsa wood.

Snooker, golf and rugger take centre stage

While golf and snooker aren’t the greatest spectator sports in the world, they are ripe for betting. Find the best odds for tonight’s action with our oddschicken.

Snooker
2008 Masters quarter-finals (BBC2, 7pm)

Rugby Union Carnegie Challenge Cup
Castres/ Leeds (Sky Sports 1, 7.45pm)

Golf PGA Tour
Bob Hope Chrysler Classic Day Two (Setanta Golf, 8pm)