He’s going totally barmy over Barry…

Nip into a central London casino at midnight, and prepare to be shocked. Men are literally losing their minds. Bad poker hands are desperately clung on to, stakes piling through the roof. It’s like a world of careless investments that no one can control because they’re all buzzing off vodka and Redbull. Or, in most cases, strong South American cocaine and a little dab of speed.

Unfortunately, Rafa Benitez can’t blame his mania on energy drinks or class A drugs, because his hideously mis-informed decisions are taking place during the morning, when most people are still sober, and even executives haven’t started on the narcotics yet.

By flogging Peter Crouch to Portsmouth for £11 million, he made Voronin - a man who hates Liverpool - the only back-up should Torres need a rest from dragging the front line through the season.