1. Michael Owen should never have signed for Manchester United:
Look at the company he was keeping last night; Obertan, Macaheda, Wellbeck - all clearly reserve players. And this is the category Owen now falls into at United. Ignored when the big games come around, his chances to impress now only arrive in insignificant matches, so the clamour for Capello to pick him is no less ludicrous than expecting Marcello Lippi to give Macheda a call.
Had Owen swallowed his pride and signed for a lesser club, he might be seeing some action in the Premier League, in the process testing himself against international-calibre defenders. When he fails to make Fabio’s 23 in June, he has his own pride to blame.
2. Goalkeepers should stop guessing in shoot-outs:
Following his heroics in the Peace Cup Final penalty shoot-out in the summer, a friend of thespoiler went to interview Brad Guzan to suss out his penalty-saving secrets. Guzan revealed that he has never understood why many keepers merely guess where the penalty is going, and hurl themselves in that direction before the kicker makes contact with the ball. His own preference was to wait, and rely on natural reaction to make it in time.
This worked to extraordinary effect, saving four penalties, bringing to mind Mark Bosnich’s awesome performance against Sunderland in the same competition 16 years ago. So is Guzan right? Are keepers bottling it at shoot-outs?
3. Michael Laudrup is spending today sitting by the phone:
For those who didn’t get their copy of Marca delivered this morning, Real Madrid got soaked 4-0 by 3rd division Alcorcon in the Copa del Rey last night. Madrid coach Manuel Pellegrini described himself as, “very embarrassed”, although “very sacked” may soon prove more appropriate.
Another eight matches for your consumption this evening, although at least CSKA Moscow and Manchester United (5:30pm SS2) have the decency to kick off a little earlier for us armchair fans.
At 7:45, the two most successful clubs in European Cup history meet for the first time in almost seven years. Many expect Madrid to absolutely tank Milan, whilst in the other Group B fixture, Marseille will be collecting some Toblerone, and probably three points in Zurich.
Elsewhere, Besiktas go to Wolfsburg, whilst victory for Bordeaux at home to Bayern, could mean big trouble for Juventus, who themselves are at home to whipping boys Maccabi Haifa tonight.
For those without Sky Sports, Chelsea - Atletico is on ITV1 at 7:30, whilst the other Group D game tonight, Porto vs APOEL, should go largely unwatched.
As ever, predictions below…
UPDATE: Thespoiler has just been reminded that this year’s Champions League final is on a Saturday. Thank goodness Simon Cowell is usually on his holidays by then, or we may be looking forward to the first ever ITV2 Champions League final.
The Madridistas have found a new hero, says our Spanish media spy
If he scores against Villarreal tonight, Cristiano Ronaldo will make history, by becoming the first ever Real Madrid player to score in his first four consecutive league clashes. With the Primera season well underway, The Spoiler’s Real Madrid mole Valentine Fell tells us how the Spanish capital has responded since his ceremonious arrival…
The media
Despite the obligatory negative swipes he has been receiving, the press are desperate to speak to C-Ron: the ‘mixed zone’ at the Bernabeu turns into a full-on rugby-scrum every week in an attempt to get so much as a soundbite from him. There’s no doubt the city’s physiotherapists will be getting a few more visits in the coming months, due to the contortionist-like positions the media are having to put themselves in to get their mics anywhere near his little pocky face.
The Portuguese media
A batch of mentalists that warrant their own group. The press conferences are head-banglingly annoying as the Portuguese press seem to have camped out at Valdebebas (the team’s training ground) to ask every single player and staff member about the perma-tanned one. It’s a little like watching an overbearing parent at an open evening. The rest of the media are all waiting patiently for the player who blows his fuse first. My money is on Raul!
His teammates
Watching Cristiano in training is like watching a machine. Before
Caroline Celico to bring Brazilian church denomination to Spain
While Kaka keeps La Liga from becoming a godless enterprise this season, his wife Caroline Celico will try to spread the Holy word through the streets of the Spanish capital by becoming a pastor.
Caroline and Kaka were married by the Renascer em Cristo (Reborn in Christ Church) in 2005, and in the video above, the Real Madrid star’s better half is inducted into the Evangelist denomination by church founder Sônia Hernandes. While embracing her young son Luca Celico Leite, Caroline explains her intention of bringing the Brazilian denomination to Madrid:
“While Dad is scoring goals, we will crush the head of the devil.”
Continuing with this vaguely terrifying tone, she says:
“Adolescents in this world are only about prostitution, smoking drinking and drugs.”
The best nude model/ football agent/ Euro 2008 WAG out there
It appears that Nereida Gallardo isn’t the only Spanish WAG who will display her chemically-enhanced chest at the drop of a five Euro note. Today’s WAG of the Day is Nuria Bermúdez, one of Madrid’s most recognized ‘It’ girls who makes Danielle Lloyd’s impressive tally of footballer conquests look laughable.
In her prime, which appears to have begun not long after her fifteenth birthday, she boasted that she had slept with no less than six of Real Madrid’s first team. In addition, she claimed to have exchanged ‘raunchy texts’ with David Beckham and was sued by Luis Figo for suggesting he was two-timing his lovely model wife Helen Svedin with her. Interestingly, neither player ever denied the allegations.
As you may expect from any self-respecting lady who will happily remove her top on live television, she has served her time under C-Ron. During Euro 2008, however, the salacious wild child will be cheering on her new-ish husband, Spanish striker Dani Güiza.
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