There are merely a few simple rules to follow if you’re going to make it as a good WAG. Most of them are handy tips on how to iron your hair without catching fire, but one of the most important rules is NEVER BE SEEN WITHOUT ANY MAKE UP ON!

The reason for this is simple - footballers have never experienced a natural female breast, and they’ll be damned if they EVER have to witness a woman in anything but her finest clothes/lingerie, with a fully