Boss Dick Advocaat maintains hardline policy…

New Belgium manager Dick Advocaat was brought into whip an unbelievably underachieving squad into shape, and he’s taking his job pretty seriously. Marouane Fellaini is already a marked man, having missed a match to go to the dentist and reported for training in the wrong coloured socks.

Now Vincent Kompany has felt Dick’s wrath, being told to pack his bags after failing to get back in time from his grandmother’s funeral in Brussels, as Belgium were preparing for last night’s clash with Qatar.

The most inspired transfer activity of the season

As The Spoiler’s end of season festivities get into full swing, today we look at the best signings of the 2008/09 Premier League campaign. Sorry Wisey, Xisco and Coloccini didn’t make the cut…

Jose Bosingwa (Porto to Chelsea, £16.3m)
Whether Jose Bosingwa (or ‘Boswinga’ if you’re Jamie Redknapp) was officially a Big Phil Scolari signing is a point of contention, but considering the four other members of his inspirational clutch of signings have only racked up 22 starts and three goals between them, we’ll give him the benefit of the doubt. However, what can’t be argued against is how seamlessly the full back has slotted into Chelsea’s defence this season, in a role the Blues have previously struggled to fill.

James Beattie (Sheffield Utd to Stoke, £2.5m)
It was fair to assume Beattie’s Premier League days were numbered after a pretty woeful spell at Everton earned him a move down to the Championship with Sheffield United last season. Yet after answering Stoke’s SOS call in the January transfer window, Beatts has signaled his return to the top flight by averaging nearly a goal every other game and contributing to 13 of the 24 points Stoke have picked up since his arrival. Such season-saving form might just be the best £2.5m Tony Pulis has ever spent.

Marouane Fellaini (Standard Liege to Everton, £15m)
Fellaini’s Premier League success isn’t too surprising considering the fact that 32 foreign scouts were in the crowd to watch him play in Liege’s title-winning league match last season. Still, the lanky afro cultivator was pretty much unknown to fans over here until making his mark as the driving force behind a Liege team that by all rights should’ve beaten Liverpool to Champions League qualification at the start of the season. Clocking in with an impressive nine goals and firmly establishing himself as a midfield battler, that £15m price tag everyone laughed at now looks a bit less ridiculous.

Wilson Palacios (Wigan to Tottenham, £12m)
Harry Redknapp’s transfer market dial

Marouane Fellaini gets in trouble because he is big, apparently

If The Spoiler were to head out on to Oxford Street and ask 100 people to name the ten most recognisable faces in the Premier League, not a single person would mention Marouane Fellaini. Everton boss Steve Round, however, believes his memorable visage is the reason why he has picked up eight bookings in twelve league games this term:

“He’s disappointed with how many bookings he’s had and has put that down to inexperience. But we’ve also put it down to the fact he’s quite recognisable.

“I think referees need to book him on merit rather than because it’s ‘big’ Fellaini.

It’s very sweet of Round to stick up for Fellaini and his reprehensible hairstyle, but the reason for the Belgian’s constant cautions is quite simple: he commits a shitload of fouls.