The Spoiler

Drogba auditions for Casualty, Spiderman forgets his mask and a ten goal thriller


Also appearing on a computer near you…

Didier Drogba takes football theatrics to seizure-tastic new levels

Jonas ‘Spiderman’ Gutierrez finally scores… but leaves his Spidey mask in the dressing room
[The Sun]

Game of the weekend: Lyon 5 - Marseille 5
[101 Great Goals]

6 stadiums which have sold their souls - although ‘Bargain Booze Stadium’ conjures fond memories of The Spoiler’s student days
[Telegraph]

John Terry will now have a special chant for every member of his family
[News of the World]

Are Eboue and Sagna ready to quit Arsenal’s goal party?
[Caught Offside]

Wee Gordon Strachan thinks marriage is the key to Boro’s problems
[Off The Post]

1 CommentTags: , , , , , , , , , ,

Posted: November 9th, 2009 by Richard Gilzene

Has Ronaldo been cursed?


Cristiano appears to have suffered at the hands of the dark arts

Cristiano Ronaldo

September 29th, 2009:
An anonymous sorcerer claims to have placed an injury curse on Cristiano Ronaldo, at the behest of a mystery enemy.

September 30th, 2009: Marseille’s Souleymane Diawara is dismissed for a foul on Cristiano Ronaldo, who subsequently limps off. The Spanish press say the Portuguese star was rushed to hospital yesterday with an “ankle traumatism and Grade-1 ligament sprain”. He is likely to miss Sunday’s clash with Sevilla.

Add CommentTags: , , , , , ,

Posted: October 2nd, 2009 by Ryan Bailey

Tottenham chase Madrid striker, Ronaldo’s AIDs scare and cricket’s hottest WAG


Also appearing on a computer near you…

Jessica TaylorCricket WAG Jessica Taylor does her bit for the cause of lingerie
[DJ Mick]

Why Manchester Utd are doomed this season
[Republik of Mancunia]

(Fat) Ronaldo almost got AIDs
[Dirty Tackle]

Marseille midfielder Lorik Cana could be on his way to Everton
[Daily Mail]

Carlos Tevez is excited about winning trophies at his new club
[The Telegraph]

Spurs want Klaas-Jan Huntelaar again
[Goal.com]

Add CommentTags: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Posted: July 14th, 2009 by Ryan Bailey

Owen negotiates deal with Everton, Chelsea target £19m Brazilian sensation


The latest transfer gossip, rumours and damned lies

Michael Owen

Michael Owen to Everton

Back in April, The Daily Express claimed the Toffees were after the charismatic Newcastle striker, and the rumour has resurfaced today in The Mirror. Apparently, Owen has entered negotiations and has been offered £50k-a-week to sign up on a free transfer. £50k? He wouldn’t get off the injury table for any less than £100k at St James’ Park!

The Spoiler truth-o-meter: Seems like a good option, if only for the fact that he can be nearer his horsies and will save a fortune of helicopter fuel.

Alexandre Pato and Glen Johnson to Chelsea
As if taking their manager wasn’t bad enough, The Sun believe Chelsea have offered Milan £30m to steal away 19-year-old Brazilian wunderkind and webcam fan Pato. Apparently, the smokey Italian is also interested in reintroducing

Read more

1 CommentTags: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Posted: June 2nd, 2009 by Ryan Bailey

Arsenal target Russian striker, Djibril Cisse anounces Spurs move, Tevez linked to City


The latest transfer gossip, rumours and damned lies

Pavel Pogrebnyak

Pavel Pogrebnyak to Arsenal
Approximately 100 per cent of Arsenal fans are completely fed up with Emmanuel Adebayor, who is said to be departing this summer, possibly to his beloved AC Milan. The Mirror say Professor Wenger is looking for a replacement, and will bag Zenit St. Petersburg’s unpronounceable Blackburn-hating striker Pavel Pogrebnyak if Roque Santa Cruz is lured elsewhere.

The Spoiler truth-o-meter:
The Gunners already have a relationship with Zenit, so we may get to enjoy another transfer saga and drawn-out and painful as the Arshavin one during the summer.

Djibril Cisse to Tottenham
The Daily Mail are claiming that the fashion conscious forward has told Sunderland team-mates he will call White Hart Lane home next season.

The Spoiler truth-o-meter: Apparently, Marseille have already

Read more

Add CommentTags: , , , , , , , ,

Posted: May 11th, 2009 by Ryan Bailey

Everton to swoop for Michael Owen, Liverpool target £10m Marseille midfielder


The latest transfer gossip, rumours and damned lies…

Lorik Cana

Lorik Cana to Liverpool
If Xabi Alonso head off the Juventus in the summer, Liverpool may bring in the £10m-rated Marseille captain who showed Rafa his class in the Champions League earlier this season.

The Spoiler truth-o-meter: Alonso’s agent denied the Juventus link yesterday, but if he does go, the lauded Albanian international Cana will make a good replacement.

Michael Owen to Everton
The Daily Express claim Everton will make a shock swoop for the former Liverpool star this summer. It’s understood they won’t match his (stupidly high) £100,000 weekly wages, but

Read more

2 CommentsTags: , , , , , , , , , , ,

Posted: April 30th, 2009 by Ryan Bailey

Robbie Savage gets drenched live on Sky Sports News


Stephen Bywater chooses the perfect time to prank a teammate

At the start of the season, morale at Derby County was so low that players were willing to sneak through windows if it meant escaping Paul Jewell’s regime. That’s all changed under Nigel Clough though. Robbie Savage is a first-team regular again having been sent to Brighton on loan earlier this season and his teammates are delighted to have him back. Stephen Bywater decided to show his love for the Welshman by showering him with drink live on Sky Sports News. Be sure to check out Savage’s face as he realises what’s about to happen but has nowhere to run.

[Credit: 101GG]

Add CommentTags: , , , , , , , , ,

Posted: March 20th, 2009 by Michael Lintorn

Is Didier Drogba about to return to Marseille?


Striker has “unfinished business” in the South of France

Didier Drogba at Marseille

Last Summer, Ivorian hitman Didier Drogba was linked to a whole host of clubs, including his former employer Olympique Marseille. The stroppy striker shares a special relationship with the Ligue 1 side, so much so that their fans were willing to club together and raise the transfer fee necessary to bring him back.

Drogba - who failed to make the Chelsea squad for last week’s match with Stoke - hinted in yesterday’s Evening Standard that he would like to return to the club for whom he made just 35 appearances:

“It’s unfinished business with Marseille. It’s hard to know if one day we will have the chance to finish this adventure, maybe in a better way.

“I still feel at home there. It’s not necessarily the right moment for me to speak about a possible return to L’OM. I have a lot of respect for Chelsea and as long as I’m under contract with them, I can’t express myself.

“If something is made to happen, I don’t know on which conditions, L’OM are going to have to contact Chelsea.”

It seems Le Drog has set his sights on a return to his former club, but if a transfer did go ahead, he would probably have to deal with a hefty pay cut: Marseille were recently offered the striker on loan, but declined as they couldn’t afford to cover his wages.

[Goal.com]

Add CommentTags: , , , , ,

Posted: January 21st, 2009 by Ryan Bailey