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Snap out of your January slumber with The Ramones! 

West Ham found guilty of crowd trouble

[The Telegraph]

Keown’s thoughts on Sol Campbell

[The Daily Mail]

Liverpool land Chamakh

[Mirror Football]

Cristiano Ronaldo - underpants model

[Kickette]

Classic goal!

[Pies]

Players to watch in the Africa Cup of Nations

[via The Offside]

Keegan horsing around during a pre-match training session

With the end of the first decade of the Millenium just about mouthing “hello” from over the horizon, The Spoiler is taking the opportunity to doff a cap to some of the teams that graced the field in the year 2000.

Today, it’s the turn of the first 21st Century England team, coached by Keegan, who played host to Argentina in a 0-0 thriller at Wembley on 23 February 2000. Listed below…

Goalkeeper, David Seaman (Arsenal, 56 caps)

Seaman was not just a grown man with a moustache, he was also a wonderful goalkeeper. So wonderful that only Peter Shilton can boast more international caps. Seaman went on to amass 75 of the things, whilst only slightly smudging his career with a howler against Brazil during the 2002 World Cup. You know, when Ronaldinho floated one in from miles away? Cringe!

Centre Back, Martin Keown (Arsenal, 28 caps)

Now a rather softly-spoken, haunting presence on the MOTD2 sofa, Martin Keown was considerably less eloquent with his tackling. Probably a victim of the Graham Taylor curse, he was overlooked for England throughout Venables’ reign, only to be brought back in by Hoddle, then absolutely adored by Keegan. Interestingly, both of his parents were/are Irish.

Centre Back, Sol Campbell (Spurs, 30 caps)

During his England career, Campbell managed to feature in six successive tournaments, which apparently is a record for an English player. Well done Sol. And who knows? He might even make it to a seventh one day. Probably not though. He’s currently looking for a new home.

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[Off The Post]

David Beckham’s temporary Milan home comes with a prostitute seal of approval
[Dirty Tackle]

Carly Zucker and Alex Curran hit the gym
[Kickette]

Martin Keown believes Liverpool’s success is due to their lack of Robbie Keane
[Daily Mail]

The top ten ‘tricked out athlete’s cars
[The Angry T]

Sticks and stones may break his bones, But Gareth Southgate won’t get a haircut
[Sky Sports]

WAG Giorgia Palmas is not unattractive
[On205th]

These men just couldn’t stay away…

In the biblical tale of the Prodigal Son, a young man ventures to the big city to fill up on wine and hookers before going home to lead a normal domestic life as an accountant, or something. In some ways, it’s exactly the same tale as that of Shaun Wright-Phillips and Manchester City, only without the fatted calf, the hookers, the wine… the bible. But no matter.

This, along with Heskey’s suspected return to Liverpool, got The Spoiler to thinking, and by the time we’d polished off our lunchtime amuse bouche followed by soup, we’d pretty much compiled a team made up of returning players. All with varying degrees of success.

In goal, we went for everyone’s favourite drug-eating maniac, Mark Bosnich.