The latest victim of Boca Juniors’ resident ladykiller

Former Villarreal and current Boca Juniors star Juan Román Riquelme hit headlines around the time of World Cup 2006 when he started boffing Sports Illustrated model Yésica Toscanini - a great conquest for an international footballer, but not quite so commendable for a man with a wife and three kids. Presumably, the romance with Miss Toscanini and his suffering spouse has expired, as the Argentinean has since been linked with nude model Melina Nicolas.

Some criticise the Olympic Gold medal winner for lacking speed on the pitch, but Melina has been quick to assure us this is not the case in the bedroom. She gives his performances a modest ten out of ten, and says that he “varies his pace and acceleration”. Good to know.

C-Ron’s clothes-hating ex speaks in new magazine interview

Thanks to the Spanish demand for a magazine which covers political and economic news and publishes near-pornographic images of famous women, Interviú exists. On the cover of this month’s edition is Nereida Gallardo, the lady who nearly melted the entire internet last summer when she romanced Cristiano Ronaldo.

In addition to posing with a Real Madrid shirt in the loosest sense possible, the perma-nude Majorcan gave her two cents on her former lover’s recent tryst with fellow dirtbag Paris Hilton:

“Nothing matters to him. She is just another shag. If he carries on at this pace Madrid should tremble.”

During their eight month relationship, Nereida says she spent five days a week in Manchester and the other two in Palma (Mallorca), and she seems irritated by the fact that she left her job because she asked him to. We’re not sure what that job was, but presumably it must have been more lucrative than the countless modelling jobs and TV appearances she has scored off the back of her WAG status.

When asked if she would ever try to rekindle the romance with the Portuguese man-o’-sex, Nereida simply says: “He would laugh in my face.”

More slightly-NSFW picture fun from Interviú after the jump…

Us neither, but here it is anyway

In order to simultaneously raise awareness of cancer and his own hunky physique, West Ham star Carlton Cole has posed nude for the Cosmopolitan’s annual Naked Centrefold special. (Can you believe it’s that time of year again? RAWR!)

If you are so inclined, click here for video of Mr Cole unencumbered by clothing.

Soup du jour model likes her men hairless and vain

Those with far too much free time will have seen the first episode of Big Brother last Thursday, where a pair of 30GG breasts entered the house, followed a few minutes later by their owner Sophie Reade. (Throw the 20-year-old’s name into Google images and you will see the nature of her employment, provided the ‘Safesearch’ option is turned off.)

By posing for Playboy unencumbered by clothing in 2008, the Cheshire model fulfilled her ‘greatest ambition’, and also revealed her love of a certain Manchester Utd star. When asked ‘Which celebrity gets her hot?’, Sophie said:

Christiano Ronaldo has a brooding Spanish charm and he is incredibly athletic so I wouldn’t have to worry about him flaking out on me.

Playboy are keen to stress that Sophie failed all her GCSEs, which may explain her love of the Portuguese star’s ‘Spanish charm’. Playboy shouldn’t feel too smug though - they manage to spell the name of the world’s most famous footballer incorrectly. Twice.

The interview continues:

Describe your dream date and with whom?
It would be with Christiano Ronaldo who would shower me

She’s not shy, this one

Real Madrid’s Dutch winger Royston Drenthe - also known as Edgar David’s nephew - has reportedly sparked up a relationship with Spanish glamour model Malena Gracia.

Going out with a Playboy model who refuses to be photographed wearing clothes sounds great, but apparently Drenthe’s wife - who is expecting their second child - isn’t too happy.

Brazilian stars love displaying their gentleman’s packages online

While most European players are content with filling their leisure time with an unhealthy amount of Xbox, the boys from Brazil seem to be wiling away the hours broadcasting their genitalia on the interweb.

Last week, we showed you how AC Milan’s Pato had “pulled an Ashley Young”, and our friends at Popbitch have turned our attention back to the Brazilian gossip blog on which we discovered the Duck’s indiscretion.

The extraordinarily NSFW Glossx suggests displaying one’s junk online is the number one pastime among Brazilian footballers. It’s not quite clear who they are showing their wangs to, or what kind of honey trap

Some NSFW fun from the home of Reading FC

Technically speaking, this lady interrupted the London Irish egg chasers, but seeing the event occurred in the stadium where Leroy Lita and co do their business, we felt Spoiler readers deserved to see it.

We hear the not-unattractive clothes dodger was rewarded with £3,000 for her naked troubles - if anyone can back that up please let us know. It’s exactly the kind of incentive scheme the Premier League could do with.

… If Bayern win the Champions League

Luca Toni’s Bayern Munich are high on Champions League confidence after putting approximately 412 goals past Sporting in the last round, but face a huge challenge against Barcelona in the quarter-finals this month.

The World Cup winner has been decorated with many honours in his football career, but he is willing to give anything to get his hands around the European Cup, including his clothes and dignity:

“Reaching Rome is my goal. I have won so many titles in my career but this one still eludes me.

“If we bring the Champions League trophy back to Munich, I promise: I will walk naked through the Marienplatz!”

Toni believes Bayern Munich have the mettle to win the competition, thanks to the fact that they field “eleven lions”, rather than “eleven professionals”. Frankly, we can’t see the Germans getting past Barcelona or Liverpool/ Chelsea in the semis, but the proposed nudity stunt will definitely excite his legions of female fans: Italian women recently voted Toni as the footballer they would most like to see naked.

[Bild]