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Scary picture of the day: Violent criminal Joey Barton has not procreated (thank God), he’s just doing his bit at a Newcastle Utd charity event
[Kickette]

Manchester Utd vehemently deny the latest Ronaldo to Real Madrid gossip
[BBC]

Nicole Scherzinger gets sexy for Maxim magazine
[Grid Crasher]

John O’Shea laughs off gay taunts
[Eleven a Side]

When football Christmas parties turn bad
[The Guardian]

David Beckham meets his High School Musical idols
[Machochip]

Is Mounir El Hamdaoui heading back to the Lane? Will he play a game this time?
[Caught Offside]

Timewaster: The football haircuts quiz
[Quizible]

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Arsenal fans: Were you saying “boo” or “boo-urns”? Either way, the Professor didn’t like it

The most phallic sports team logo you’re likely to see
[WithLeather]

Champions League preview: Why Arsenal will send out a message by winning tonight
[chickendinner]

Has (fat) Ronaldo’s latest move ended his European career?
[The Offside]

Liverpool target a Hamburg striker
[Caught Offside]

Lazio and Spurs are after Elano
[Footy Latest]

F1 WAG Nicole Scherzinger looked good while doing some miming at the weekend
[WWTDD]

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Ronaldinho shows us how to win a UEFA Cup game in style
[The Offside]

Premier League ref Mark Clattenburg’s Porsche isn’t in great shape
[Machochip]

Happy Birthday Rio Ferdinand!
[Kickette]

Video: Nicole Scherzinger declares her love for Lewis Hamilton
[Grid Crasher]

That’s NOT Tennis: Jelena Jankovic’s denim waistcoat
[Polite Applause]

ChickenDinner - she is so beautiful now
[ChickenDinner]

Jens Lehmann denied a dignified send-off
[The Beautiful Game]

Killjoys ban streaking (um, isn’t it technically banned anyway?)
[WithLeather]

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The Offside provide an excellent reason why players shouldn’t yellow card referees

Are Lewis Hamilton and Nicole Scherzinger engaged?
[Grid Crasher]

A naughty cheerleader
[SportsByBrooks]

Football player struck by a firework in Northern Ireland
[Daily Mail]

Looks like David Beckham will walk away from the Galaxy sooner than we all thought
[Machochip]

Francesco Totti dedicates this week’s victory over Chelsea to a young boy killed on the way to the game
[The Beautiful Game]

WAG Gemma Atkinson in this week’s Nuts
[On205th]

Queen of WAGs gets a steamy girlband makeover

If there’s one WAG who can outsexy Lewis Hamilton’s current lady of choice - Nicole Scherzinger from the Pussycat Dolls - then it’s Mrs Peter Crouch. Here’s Abbey getting ‘made up’ on her fashion show, the imaginatively-titled The Fashion Show.

(When she finally shows her raunchy popstar ensemble to the band, note the area of her body the cameraman is most keen to zoom in on.)

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What would Jeff Stelling and co do if football didn’t exist?

Lewis Hamilton to marry Pussycat Doll Nicole Scherzinger at Christmas?
[Grid Crasher]

Jose Mourinho may not get an easy ride when Inter face Werder Bremen tonight
[Bild]

Justin Timberlake to host PGA Tour tournament
[Polite Applause]

Manchester Utd aren’t selling any season tickets and it’s all Fergie’s fault
[The Guardian]

More bad news for Fergie - Scholes is out for ten weeks
[Football365]

Former West Ham star Ian Pearce drops down eleven leagues
[The Mirror]

Cheryl Cole and her band attempt singing, but fail

[Watch With Mothers]

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A tip of the cap to the gentlefolk at WithLeather, who have unearthed a rather splendid gallery of everybody’s favourite Olympian Leryn Franco

How Spurs got it all wrong with Dimitar Berbatov
[The Offside]

A Swedish TV commentator has outraged Germans by alluding to a certain Mr A Hitler during the Olympics
[Bild]

Is Lewis Hamilton house hunting with his Pussycat Doll?
[Grid Crasher]

Kaka says no to Chelsea
[Football365]

Keeper facing permanent deafness after a fan threw a firecracker at him
[The Beautiful Game]

Miss Grenada speaks out after being two-timed by McLaren star

Ahead of the weekend’s British Grand Prix action, Grid Crasher editor Ollie Irish steps in to tell us about the latest adventures of the world’s favourite Swiss racing driver…

Miss Grenada, aka Vivian Burkhardt, has ripped into Lewis Hamilton, after discovering that he had two-timed her with Pussycat Doll Nicole Scherzinger.

“His life away from the track is far from glamorous,” Burkhardt told the News of the Screws. “Despite his huge wealth, I hate his lifestyle and feel sorry for him. There he is in Switzerland, where he has no friends, no family, just this amazing four-bedroom flat in the richest part of the city - but it’s simply big and empty.”

Ouch. Imagine having to live in Switzerland with no friends. A terrible double whammy.