Die Mannschaft channel Sin City and a bit of Watchmen…

A little less standing around and this could’ve bested classic Nike adverts such as “No! It’s rounder,” and “Au Revoir”. Or at least that’s what The Spoiler called them in primary school.

UPDATE: Having actually watched both Nike adverts again, The Spoiler can confirm they will never be bested, ever.

Yes, it’s a Nike advert, but it’s a good Nike advert

Arsenal forward will now feel more comfortable in biker bars

Spoiler promotion: Fancy a free punt? Of course you do, silly billy! Check out hundreds of pounds worth of free football bets at
OLBG Sports

How on Earth can the Champions League final continue?

As The Spoiler surveyed the front page of the nation’s favourite daily newspaper this morning, we almost dropped our monocle into our corn flakes, such was the astonishment created by the news that Wayne Rooney’s boots have been stolen ahead of tonight’s Champions League final:

“Rooney’s sponsors Nike had flown in a specially-made pair of T90 laser boots for the striker to wear. But the England star, 23, was stunned when told a thief had intercepted the delivery.

“Roo had planned to wear the boots in training yesterday, but instead was forced to use an old pair.”

Using an old pair of boots during training? What a disgusting abuse of Rooney’s right to wear boxfresh footwear on a daily basis; he must have been absolutely fuming.

The Sun believe Rooney’s shiny brand new and highly desirable Nike T90 laser boots may have been taken by an opportunist thief or a Barca-based saboteur, but they fail to entertain the notion that this is a completely made up story designed to give publicity for Rooney’s shiny brand new and highly desirable Nike T90 laser boots…

New shirt design includes homage to Chelsea right-back

Here’s the latest potential design for Manchester Utd’s 2009/10 home kit. It’s fairly similar to the current shirt, with the exception of the black ‘V’ stripe across the chest, which we believe to be inspired by Jose Bosingwa’s monobrow.

There’s also a version floating around with a white collar…

Man Utd star generous to kid who made him look like a chump

A tidbit from our friends at Popbitch:

This week Nike released a new video showing Wayne Rooney being nutmegged by a local kid. A Man Utd fanzine reported that Rooney was so amused that he offered football tickets to the kid involved. It wasn’t just an empty gesture, as one night Rooney called up the young lad and told him to come meet him, then handed over the tickets and fifty quid for the kid and his mate to have a drink at the match.

Fifty quid for a drink at the match? Did Rooney think they were at The Emirates or something?

Liverpool star advoactes well trained dogs

Obviously bored with Liverpool’s dull-as-dishwater style of play, Fernando Torres has turned to other avenues for (well paid) kicks. A few weeks ago, we saw him star in an advert for a Spanish salon, and now we see him promoting some kind of dog school.

Hang on a second - would one of Europe’s top strikers be a part of something with such shoddy production values? Would he really let a small provincial hairdresser mess with his wonderfully feathered locks? This all stinks of a Nike viral video campaign (look at all the clothes they’re wearing in the clip above), and we’ve fallen for it. Curses!

Spoiler bonus: We recognise that Stevie G-loving German Shepherd from somewhere. Could he be Hank, the stunt mutt who did Nando like a kipper?

[Kickette]

Argentinean spends the day in the capital

Fresh from yesterday’s triumph at Old Trafford, Carlos Tevez spent today in foggy London town with his wife Vanessa and daughter Florencia. A Spoiler informant spotted the family in Nike Town on Oxford St, where the Manchester Utd star was more than happy to pose for pictures with fans.

He picked out a “trolley full” of gear before getting it all rung up at the till - apparently, Nike aren’t willing to give their products to their most famous stars…