Also appearing on a computer near you…

Manchester Utd photoshoppers win the billboard war
[Off The Post]

…And they may have won the Sky Sports FanZone war too
[WithLeather]

Phil Jagielka was robbed at knifepoint
[The Guardian]

It’s D-Day for Newcastle as The Geordie Messiah attempts to take them to the cleaners
[Betfair Football]

‘Germany’s hottest WAG’ Nives Celzijus has a new photoshoot
[Bild]

‘Arry’s striker dilemma
[Sky Sports News]

Deportivo La Coruna can’t sign Giovani Dos Santos because they didn’t read the rulebook properly
[Goal.com]

Bundesliga beauty speaks of Frenchman’s ‘charm’

Croatian singer, model, socialite and writer Nives Celzijus has gained a huge following in Germany since her husband Dino Drpić joined Karlsruher SC. Her fame has arisen from a combination of steamy photoshoots, sexy claims (such as her claim that she boffed her husband on the pitch where England lost a vital Euro 2008 qualifier), and her regular column for newspaper Bild.

Nives usually uses her column inches in Europe’s biggest newspaper to single out the most attractive players in the Bundesliga, and her most recent is no expception.

Firstly, she calls attention to players with long hair: apparently, the likes of Andriy Voronin cannot get away with a long mane, but handsome devils like Nesta or Nuno Gomes can pull it off.

Also appearing on a computer near you…

Nives Celzijus tells aspiring money grabbers how to become a submissive WAG. Advice includes “Be a virgin”, “Be a whore in bed” and “Don’t be modest”
[Bild]

Barcelona president Joan Laporta thinks Kaka shouldn’t join Real Madrid - what a shock
[Channel 4]

Bad news for football tattoo enthusiasts and perverts
[The Offside]

Five Accrington Stanley players charged for betting against themselves
[The Guardian]

Portsmouth hope ‘Arry will lend them a Mexican
[Fans FC]

Also appearing on a computer near you…

Bundesliga WAG Nives Celzijus poses for German FHM
[FHM]

One sexy Newcastle fan keeps getting interviewed by local news channels
[101GG]

Don’t **** with Steaua Bucharest’s Chairman
[Dirty Tackle]

Arsenal are tracking “Serbian Starlet” Daniel Aleksic
[Soccer Blog]

There’ something not quite right about this picture of Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush
[Deadspin]

Stevie G pleads not guilty to affray charge
[Daily Mail]

Also appearing on a computer near you…

Trousers off: Spanish side Galactico Pegaso protest the same way Jermain Defoe celebrates after a match
[101GG]

Robbie Keane’s WAG Claudine Palmer may be getting her own reality TV show
[WAGs Blog]

Gene Hackman isn’t helping
[Off The Post]

Nives Celzijus wants to make whoopy on the roof of the Bernabeu
[Dirty Tackle]

Bad news Pompey - Sven doesn’t want to leave Mexico
[Daily Mail]

Shock: Cristiano Ronaldo done it with a girl
[The Sun]

Newcastle secure the services of Swedish starlet Samuel Adjei
[Sky Sports]

Don’t let the man bottom in the video grab put you off

Nives Celzijus is the Playboy model who done it with her husband Dino Drpić in the middle of the pitch, and apparently she is some kind of popstar in Croatia. Here’s what we learn from this video:

1. Europop rocks, ja!
2. Continental Europeans are more than happy to see simulated sex acts in mainstream music videos.
3. If you are ever in a Croatian hotel and two policemen arrive at your door, they will probably want to engage in overt homoerotic acts, go swimming, or both.

Spoiler bonus: More Nives here

Playboy model who enjoys a spot of love making on the pitch

Defender Dino Drpić has spent his entire career at Dinamo Zagreb, and is generally well-loved. His ability to focus on the pitch however, has been affected by arguments with team mates, scuffles with police men and a gambling addiction that he deems “incurable.”

One of his biggest distractions, though, is his wife Nives Celzijus, a Playboy model whose penchant for ill-fitting bikini tops is only matched by her penchant for outdoor boffing.

The 27-year-old is currently promoting her book Gola Istina (’The Naked Truth’), where she admits she had relations with Drpić on the pitch at the Maksimir Stadium - the same place England lost their vital Euro 2008 qualifier with Croatia:

“Dino had arranged that people should turn on the stadium lights for us and he finally fulfilled his dream of having sex in the middle of a football pitch. It was very naughty.”