Celtic better watch out tomorrow night

Yesterday, The Spoiler boldly claimed that Darren Bent wouldn’t reach a goal tally in the double digits next season, as we presumed Juande Ramos would find someone to push him out of the regular team. The former Charlton top scorer, however, has managed to net seven goals in friendlies against Norwich (see above) and Leyton Orient this week, and it’s looking likely that he will be getting more of a run out when the season proper begins.

Have we and the mainstream media been too hasty in labelling him a flop? Will Bent silence his critics and stick away 20+ goals in Robbie Keane’s absence in the new term? Or will he still prove expensive and not particularly good in 2008/09?

Let us know what you think with a comment below…

‘English legend’ is responsible for ‘greatest goal ever’, apparently

Darren Huckerby has just signed up for MLS team San Jose Earthquakes, and its safe to say that KRON 4 (a news channel, not a distant alien planet) are quite excited. The 32 year old from the ‘Norfolk team’ may have scored just five Championship goals last season, but that doesn’t stop the interviewer using the term ‘legend’ three times in the first 25 seconds.

Huckerby, clearly embarrassed by this over-stated praise, failed to score in his debut against Toronto last week.

Norwich keeper doesn’t care to fund Shearer’s BBC pay packet

A very conservative estimate of a Championship goalkeeper’s salary would be somewhere in the region of £200,000 to £300,000. This, you will undoubtedly agree, is a sufficient amount to cover the annual £139.50 TV licence required for every household on this island with an idiot box. Norwich City goalkeeper David Marshall would beg to differ:

Former Celtic goalkeeper David Marshall was yesterday fined £800 for not paying his TV licence. Marshall, 23, was handed the fine by magistrates in Norwich. The court was told that the keeper was caught watching TV without a valid licence. He was also ordered to pay court costs of £60 and a £15 victim surcharge.

What a poor example this man is setting. If nobody paid their licence fee, who would give Jonathan Ross the millions he deserves? Who would pay Steve McLaren to go and commentate on tournaments he should have been participating in? Who would broadcast England matches and FA Cup games? We could go on…

Carrow Road’s sexiest fan besides Delia

Today’s lower league lovely is Lisa Munday, a model and professional dancer who met Norwich City’s Jamie Cureton at a London nightclub while he was playing for Queens Park Rangers. You may recognise her tasty abs from the DVD that no self-respecting human should be without - WAGs Workout - which also stars Nicola T and Melissa Johnson.

Manchester Utd defender making the most of his time off

In the hazy days of the late nineties, Wimbledon and Norwich striker Efan Ekoku earned the nickname ‘Chief’, due to his links with a Nigerian tribe. This weekend, Manchester Utd captain Rio Ferdinand has earned precisely the same moniker, as King Akiolu inducted him into the higher echelons of African society:

“I’m a little embarrassed to be named a Chief, I’m not sure I’m worthy.
“It’s something to tell the lads. I’m sure they’ll be very happy to call me Chief.”

To the citizens of Lagos, Rio is now known as Chief ‘Fiwagboola’, a name highly befitting