The Spoiler

Hansen-approved defending, Peter goes to Hollywood and Man City chat up a 14-year-old


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Ironic that a bloke called Hansen should profit from some of the worst defending in history [via Off The Post]

The Gunners dress up for charidee, Fabregas apparently rocking a weird pony/rabbit hybrid
[Kickette]

Women’s footballer turned stripper goes back to her roots
[Dirty Tackle]

Hopefully these two will play a friendly against Martin Taylor next summer
[The Sun]

Peter (Kenyon) goes to Hollywood
[The Times]

Five players Rafa should sell in order to buy someone who can save his job
[Caught Offside]

Man City offer QPR two squad players + £1m for a 14-year-old
[The Mirror]

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Posted: November 10th, 2009 by Richard Gilzene

Carlos wants to be friends, Arnesen could get the boot and Rooney’s hissy fit explained


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Even in pipe and slippers, Dennis Bergkamp has still got it

A Besiktas fan’s (amazingly accurate) gob caused Rooney’s hissy fit
[Daily Star]

Frank Arnesen’s time might finally be up
[Goal.com]

Mr Chelsea volunteers for a job no-one wants him to do
[The Mirror]

Slightly naive Carlos Tevez could be in for a surprise on Sunday
[The Telegraph]

Sylvie Van der Vaart stands about, looks lovely
[ONTD]

A week in the life of the World’s Angriest Goalkeeper
[Dirty Tackle]

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Posted: September 18th, 2009 by Richard Gilzene

David Silva interested in Man Utd move, a Bundesliga bus crash and Keeley Hazell


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David Silva

David Silva is warming to a £30m offer from Manchester Utd
[Caught Offside]

A German team has a bus crash and Franck Ribery isn’t responsible!
[Dirty Tackle]

We didn’t know Dave Lister played in the MLS?
[Kickette]

WAG Keeley Hazell is fun, semi-naked
[On205th]

England organise a friendly with Japan
[Daily Mail]

What will Peter Kenyon do next?
[The Mirror]

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Posted: September 17th, 2009 by Ryan Bailey

UEFA tax proposals threaten Chelsea and Manchester Utd


Governing body interest in MLB-style luxury tax policy

Michel Platini

As part of their unfaltering quest to dilute the power of big spending English clubs, UEFA are said to be interested in introducing a Major League Baseball-style luxury tax policy as part of their ‘Financial Fair Play’ campaign. The Associated Press explains:

The MLB system works by taxing free-spending clubs on all they spend above a set payroll. If the luxury tax idea found favor, big spending soccer clubs would have to pay their tax before being allowed to play in the Champions League and the second-tier UEFA Cup, renamed the Europa League next season.

Among the clubs who would suffer most from this new proposal are Manchester Utd and Chelsea, who operate with huge wage bills and equally huge debts. The money collected from these taxes would be distributed around the league - last season, for example, the New York Yankees were forced to dish out over £20m to their rivals.

Obviously upset at the prospect of paying the wages of the rest of the Premier League, Chelsea chief exec Peter Kenyon made his views

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Posted: March 25th, 2009 by Ryan Bailey

Peter Kenyon duped by a Stephen Staunton impersonator


Chelsea chief exec gets merked on the airwaves

“If I get the job will I get a tracksuit with my name on it?”

Classic.

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Posted: February 13th, 2009 by Ryan Bailey

Kenyon quote: “You don’t want to sack a manager every year”


Chelsea exec looks silly two months after lobbying for continuity

Chelsea chief executive Peter Kenyon

Over the last few months, Chelsea chief executive Peter Kenyon has taken every opportunity possible to publicly back Luiz Felipe Scolari.

But anyone thinking Kenyon’s apparent loyalty stemmed from the realisation that they might be doing better if he hadn’t botched their summer attempts to sign Robinho was wrong. After all, this is the same man who expressed “absolute confidence” in Avram Grant two months before he was sacked.

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Posted: February 10th, 2009 by Michael Lintorn

Juventus plan Liverpool raid, Sunderland chase Slaven Bilic


There’s just thirteen days to go before the window is opened

Juventus boss Claudio Ranieri

In the summer everyone was expecting Xabi Alonso to move to Juventus only for coach Claudio Ranieri to eventually decide that he was too slow. The Daily Telegraph today claim that Ranieri is planning another Anfield raid, with underused duo Daniel Agger and Ryan Babel, who have eight league starts between them this season, top of his wishlist. The former Chelsea coach is poised to offer £19 million to persuade Rafael Benitez to part with his favourite substitutes. Here are today’s other major rumours:

Slaven Bilic to Sunderland
Former West Ham and Everton defender Super Slav has been backed down from 12/1 to 6/4 favourite for the Sunderland job but don’t be fooled into wasting money backing him because The Times say he is still not a leading contender.

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Posted: December 19th, 2008 by Michael Lintorn

Who should replace Didier Drogba if he leaves Chelsea?


Wantaway striker wants away yet again

Didier Drogba

For about the thousandth time in his Chelsea career, Didier Drogba has shown a desire to jump ship after being spotted in a restaurant with his agent, an Inter director and Jose Mourinho’s agent. However, for perhaps the first time, the Ivory Coast striker is no longer indispensible. Chelsea are top of the Premier League and the division’s top-scorers while Nicolas Anelka has managed eleven goals in twelve league starts. So if the Blues do finally decide to get shot of the striker, who should they bring in to replace him? Here are a few of the names that have been mentioned so far:

Adriano
The Brazilian striker was a surprise inclusion for Inter Milan in the starting line-up against Juventus, where he helped create the winning goal. There are big question marks over his attitude but former Italy coach Arrigo Sacchi has tipped him to move to Stamford Bridge, saying: ”Roman Abramovich has always liked him and I wouldn’t be surprised if Chelsea came knocking on Massimo Moratti’s door soon.”

Mario Balotelli
The 18-year-old is another Inter Milan striker who is linked with a move to Chelsea in a part-exchange deal for Drogba. Scolari is reportedly impressed by the youngster but it would be seen as a big gamble to replace Drogba with someone so inexperienced.

Lukas Podolski

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Posted: November 26th, 2008 by Michael Lintorn