It all goes wrong when you exit Old Trafford, just ask these guys
Manchester United chief executive David Gill has arrogantly suggested that Carlos Tevez’s career will go downhill if he walks away from Old Trafford.
He said: ”The game is littered with players who have left us, for whatever reason, who say after Manchester United it is downhill. Hopefully they get the right advice, they understand that and make the right decision.”
However, The Spoiler instantly thought of two courageous souls who somehow bounced back from the supposedly indescribable pain of leaving. Diego Forlan was the top La Liga scorer in 2004-05 and has this season scored a ridiculous
Chelsea/Everton, Premier League, 8pm, Sky Sports 1
David Moyes is thinking of resting some players just three days after the gruelling FA Cup semi-final against Manchester United and with a home league game against Manchester City just three days away. However, they won’t want to make too many changes because if they are easily beaten tonight it will give Chelsea a psychological advantage ahead of the final. Everton took a point against the Blues earlier this season and have drawn on their last two league visits to Stamford Bridge. Here’s how The Spoiler would line the Toffees up:
If forced to rest a few players, we would replace Phil Neville and Leon Osman with Everton’s promising youngsters while bringing in Jo to hunt for his first away Premier League goal. Should Everton field their strongest team or rest everybody? Let us know what you think with a comment below.
Can anyone stop the Manchester Utd quintuple? (Er, apart from Inter Milan, that is)
[Video: Eduardo’s incredible side-footed effort against Burnley]
Burnley and Coventry were dismissed from the FA Cup this weekend, meaning this year’s tournament will be an all-Premier League affair.
As is expected, Manchester Utd are favourites to lift the FA Cup for the twelfth time, but Phil Neville believes this will be the Toffees’ year. Is T-Bag right, or will England’s second favourite domestic prize go to someone else? Let us know your thoughts below…
To most of us, Everton’s captain is known as the second greatest player ever to come from the Neville family. To his team mates, however, Phil is known as T-Bag, thanks to his passing resemblance to the character from Prison Break who no one likes but always seems to be involved in all the plans somehow.
With his darker hair and penchant for whispy face art, we think Gary Neville is a better look-alike of the murderous one-handed child molester, but thumbs up to the Everton squad for coming up with an original nickname, resisting the temptation to lazily adding ‘y’, ‘o’ or ‘meister’ to his surname.
For every Premiership star, there is a gaggle of decidedly average teammates skulking about in his shadows. These players are neither outstanding nor terrible, they are simply hard workers with a tendency to go about their job with little fuss - probably because they don’t want to draw attention to their lack of class.
The Spoiler has lovingly compiled a starting in tribute to these headline-dodging work horses, and no, it’s not just the Middlesbrough team…
GK: Kasper Schmeichel
City’s number two shot stopper isn’t a bad keeper, but he’s no class act - it probably doesn’t help that his dad was one of the best shot stoppers the Premier League has ever seen. It’s almost tragic at how much worse he is than Schmeichel senior but at ;east he is a better use of genetic material than George Best’s profesional moron son Calum.
RB: Phil Neville
The crappier Neville brother has represented England 59 times, and is Everton’s current captain. Yet he’s never been that good at anything other than tackling.
CB: Steven Taylor
The Newcastle defender has the odd impressive performance, but if he could sustain it, maybe Shay ‘I-have-to-face-way-too-many-shots-a-match’ Given would want to stay.
CB: Anton Ferdinand
They share the same parents, play at centre back, think dodgy braids are equally cool
Everton star helps fuel the ’stupid footballers’ stereotype
Phil Neville may be a pretty decent footballer - in fact he’s the second best current player in his entire family - but there’s one game he can’t quite get the hang of.
The worst players currently plying their trade in the top flight
A survey of the worst Premier League players of all time as conducted by Top-Up TV arrived at Spoiler Towers this morning, and their ‘Relegation Utd’ looked a little something like this:
Massimo Taibi; Titus Bramble; Jean-Alain Boumsong; Abel Xavier; and Darren Peacock; Eric Djemba Djemba; Luke Chadwick; Carlton Palmer; Lee Dong Gook; Thomas Brolin; Diego Forlan; and manager Sammy Lee.
After wondering how the Top-Up TV team that didn’t include the man who Alan Mullery declared as the worst player ever to grace the top flight, Carl Leaburn, we decided that there are eleven men currently earning their keep in the Prem who would lose to this motley lot…
Paul Robinson, Blackburn
Proved that he didn’t leave his catalogue of errors at White Hart Lane when Mikel Arteta’s free-kick from a ridiculous angle caught him out on the opening day of the season.
Jlloyd Samuel, Bolton
Graduated from the same “I-may-have-a-great-name-but-I’m-not-a-great-footballer” club as Eric Djemba-Djemba and Quincy Owusu-Abeyie.
Titus Bramble, Wigan
Alright, so there was one player on their
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