Today’s transfer rumours, written out with words and punctuation

According to a Spurs message board, Anton Ferdinand and ‘one un-named Spanish bloke’ are due to be having a medical with the North London club today. The ‘Spanish bloke’, according to Spoiler reader and ‘Tottenham inside man’ Paul T, is Sevilla’s Diego Capel, and the cost will be around £12m.

Elsewhere, it seems like the transfer rumblings at rudderless Chelsea will never cease. Shevchenko is calling the shots once more…

Deco to Chelsea
It appears that Andriy Shevchenko has told Roman Abramovich and Peter Kenyon to go out and buy Deco, but his nemesis Jose Mourinho wants to bring him to Inter Milan.

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: Value diminished this season

Frank Lampard to Inter
Obviously not the first time you’ve heard this one but now Don Fabio has stuck his two lira in by claiming the move could make Lampard a better player.

The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: He’d miss kissing his Chelsea badge too much

Jo to AC Milan
The Daily Star claim that Manchester City’s UEFA Cup