Courtesy of our brothers at Polite Applause

Yeah, we know what you’re thinking: that clay court specialist Guillermo Canas is a jammy toad. Not only is he one of just two men to beat Federer in consecutive tournaments (along with Nadal), but he gets to wake up in the mornings with a young supermodel called Fabiana (pictured) sprawled clumsily across his green satin sheets. What a bastard.

Like most models, Fabiana was spotted by a cigar smoking fat man as she perused the Prog Rock section of a record shop in Brazil - she was trying to decide between ELO and Iron Butterfly, he was pretending read the back of a Doobie Brothers record, and it wasn’t long before he’d taken the will-be supermodel to one side with the promise of glitz, glamour, and stick thin women with dead eyes and eating disorders. Or, at least, that’s what we assume happened.

More sexy pictures after the jump…

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Big Rog takes on Dominik Hrbaty from 1pm BST today, bet here

It has been a tough old year for Roger. Apparently Grand Slams don’t come quite so easily anymore and maybe, just maybe, he’s about to surrender his Wimbledon crown. Rafael Nadal tops the list of the young pretenders ready to step into Federer’s flashy gold shoes and cream blazer, and the young Spaniard can’t possibly lose a third successive Wimbledon final. Here’s why…

Why Federer won’t make it six in a row

* Federer is having a disappointing year by his standards, losing in the semi final in Australia and enduring a crushing straight sets defeat in the final at Roland Garros.

* Rafael Nadal will head to Wimbledon in fine form, having won his fourth successive title at Roland Garros prior to his first victory at Queen’s club.

* The Spaniard convincingly beat Federer in the French Open, sealing a 6-1, 6-3, 6-0 victory in just one hour and forty eight minutes.

* Nadal’s victory over Federer at the French was the most one sided men’s Grand Slam final since Jimmy Connors

The best sports on the telebox tonight

After crashing out to Andy Murray in Dubai and suffering an embarrassing loss to never-heard-of-him American Mardy Fish in Indian Wells, Roger Federer looks to be back on winning ways at the Miami Open. The top seed cruised through his second round match and faces Robin Soderling at 8.15pm (BST) tonight - have a punt on that match and the tournament winner using the best odds available on the entire interweb.

Tennis
WTA Sony Ericsson Open (British Eurosport, 6pm)

Blue Square Premier
Forest Green/ Burton Albion (Setanta Sports 1, 7.45pm)

As always, the chickendinner Bet Blog predicted the unexpected

Yesterday Andy Murray defeated Swiss tennis maestro Roger Federer in Dubai in three sets (6-7, 6-3, 6-4). And if that isn’t shocking enough, The Sun described him the cocky Scot as ‘gracious’ in accepting victory, while the usually-benevolent Federer blasted Murray’s victorious techniques.

Keen readers of chickendinner’s Bet Blog were told to expect some strange results in the Dubai Championships, as it falls in the ATP’s ‘topsy-turvy’ week:

Unlike the women’s game, men’s rankings are based on their best 14 results over the season. This means that those players who play in lots of tournaments know they can endure a few first round exits without their standings being affected.

These “off days” tend to come immediately before or after big events, when they are either saving themselves or recuperating, and coming two weeks after the Dubai tournament is the “fifth Grand Slam” the Sony Ericsson Open in Miami.

The other ingredient in this murky mix is appearance money,