Footballers to be impervious to attack while driving to training grounds and local shopping centres

In light of the recent extended spate of burglaries in Cheshire, Merseyside and Manchester, several Premiership players will be bullet proofing their cars.

The Sun report that (unnamed) players from Manchester Utd, Everton and Liverpool are worried by the prospect of ambush and kidnapping, and see their flash motors as “soft targets”. With extra security mods, cars will be able to withstand hammer, gun and bomb blasts.  A made-up security industry insider told the newspaper:

“It’s all very well turning your property into a fortress. But as soon as you step outside you become a target.

Oasis frontman inflicts his charming personality on Spurs fans

Lacking the rapier wit of his older brother Noel, Liam Gallagher found an alternative way to communicate with football fans on Saturday.

The Oasis star and his untalented sibling Paul found themselves in an executive box at White Hart Lane to watch their beloved Manchester City, where they were subjected to abuse from the home supporters. “You’re just a shit Chas & Dave,” sang the Spurs fans below the box.

When Manchester City scored their 65th minute equaliser, Gallagher was quick to retaliate with some rather unfriendly hand gestures. At that point, a member of Spurs security staff stepped in:

A Tottenham source said: “Fans started getting a bit heated so a security official went to have a word with him. It was precautionary. He wasn’t chucked out and carried on watching from his box.”

Understandably, Gallagher wasn’t quite as piqued when Tottenham scored their 86th minute winner.