Wise and Jiminez’s international transfer list, in pencil…
First Nick Faldo and now Dennis Wise - what is it with men of sports authority and leaving bits of paper with team clues lying around? This fell out of Dennis Wise’s pocket in a local pie, mash, eels and old Joanna shop in the East End of London.
Seems the people of Newcastle were right about the cockney revolution after all.
On The Spoiler yesterday, Swede Oksana Andersson convincingly defeated Yank Jennifer Walcott (no relation to Theo), but the votes swung the opposite way over at On205th. Despite the split decision, Miss Andersson narrowly stole it with a 52.7 per cent majority, giving Europe a devastatingly sexy 4-0 lead in the contest. Woop woop!
On day five, a Playboy model and NFL wife is up against a Yorkshire beauty who has charmed Newcastle’s Steven Taylor and Gazza…
Round Five: Carmella DeCesare/ Tanya Robinson
[click the image to get a better view]
More pictures of Carmella here, more of Tanya here
For those sensible enough to still be at work - rather than joining all the cheerful idiots bounding around the city centre in swimming costumes, hosing each other down and smearing ice cream everywhere - here are today’s very straight-faced transfer rumours. Roll VT…
Dudu to Everton
Whoever is compiling the list of Everton transfer targets is getting into some serious shorthand, first “Jo”, and now “Dudu” - both promising Brazilians from CSKA Moscow.
The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: By the sounds of the conditions, Liverpool might be a luxurious alternative to rainy Russia.
Jeremy Helan and Darnel Situ to Manchester United
Clever, Man United - two French teenagers, surely North London bound, and yet somehow their red private jet ended up in Manchester? Bet they weren’t expecting Arsene Wenger to sound so… Scottish.
The Spoiler Truth-o-meter: What United want, United get
High Street Honey provides a ray of light in the darkness of St James’ Park
These days, Newcastle defenders have nothing to boast about, but there’s an exception to this rule in towering centre-back Steven Taylor. He may be immersed in a world of leaky defence misery on the pitch, but when the whistle goes, he gets to go home to inaugural FHM High Street Honeys winner Tanya Robinson, who, as you may gather, is completely averse to wearing anything on the top half of her body.