Wayne finally leaves the swimming pool, but doesn’t venture far

Up until yesterday, only the promise of cheap fast food had been enough to lure Wayne and Coleen Rooney away from the steps of The Wynn hotel’s swimming pool. Now, however, the Manchester Utd striker has branched out to see what the rest of Las Vegas has to offer, by moving a few feet inside the building to the Wynn’s nightclub Blush.

He’s pictured above sharing a (carbohydrate-filled and alcoholic) beverage with heavily tattooed basketball star LeBron James. Whether Coleen was still shrivelling away in the pool at this point is unknown.

Will Wayne and Coleen ever stray more than twenty yards from their hotel? Will this honeymoon go down as one of the most boring in history? The case continues…

[Fan Nation]

Manchester Utd striker’s secret passion for cancer sticks revealed

Despite being an professional sportsman who relies on his fitness to make a living, Wayne Rooney found the time to spark up a coffin nail while staying at the Wynn Casino in the city of sin this week. According to The Sun, the Manchester United striker also joined the pro-footballer smoke club - whose members include Dimitar Berbatov, David James and Zinedine Zidane - during his stag trip to Ibiza.

The biggest concern about this situation isn’t the effect the filthy habit will have on Mr Rooney’s career, but rather his flagrant abuse of smoking etiquette. Honestly, who smokes in a swimming pool? Does he smoke in the shower too? He ought to be thoroughly ashamed of himself.

Them waters are cursed, dammit

If celebrity pool parties feature highly in your social calendar, you should place Gary Neville’s name right under Barrymore’s on the ‘do not attend’ list.

Perhaps taking inspiration from the workmen who buried a Red Sox jersey under the new Yankees stadium recently, cheeky Scouse builders claim to have built a shrine to Liverpool right under the swimming pool in Gary Neville’s new home near Bolton. Bad karma-inducing labourer Brian Greer, who obviously isn’t looking to work with the Nevilles again, said:

“We went to Neville-Neville Land to tile his swimming pool.

“While we were there we created a Scouse time capsule under the pool and tiled over the top of it. When his house is dug up in the future, archaeologists will see what a passion he had for the Red men.”

The crack team of Photoshoppers at The Sun have been working day and night to produce an image