Striker wants to join Ferdinand and Berbatov on £110,000-a-week

The Sun have taken a day off from desperately trying to find links between Sir David Richards, Dr Sulaiman Al-Fahim, Thaksin Shinawatra and Portsmouth to focus on Carlos Tevez’s future.

They claim that the “greedy” striker has demanded a £15,000-a-week pay rise so that his wages match those of Dimitar Berbatov - the striker he outscored last season despite starting less games.

The Spoiler doesn’t think the demands are too outrageous. After all, when Tevez agreed his initial wages in 2007, it was after a season at West Ham where

Kerrrazy billionaire to be sidelined in takeover deal

Dr Sulaiman Al-Fahim - the perma-grinning Arab executive who stars in the UAE’s version of The Apprentice - is set to take a backseat in the Manchester City negotiations once due diligence is completed next Monday. From then on, Sheikh Mansour bin Zayed Al Nahyan and his trillion dollar family wealth will take charge:

Sheikh Mansour bin Zahed [sic] Al Nahyan, the son of the founding president of the United Arab Emirates and a senior member of the Abu Dhabi royal family, is the real power behind City’s new owners and he is planning to take an increasingly high-profile role once Ramadan finishes later this month.

It is said that the Sheikh could take a more ‘measured approach’ to running things at Eastlands, so Al-Fahim’s dream of seeing every attacking player under the sun in a sky blue shirt may never materialise.

Spoiler FYI: Political asylum seeker Dr Thaksin Shinawatra received his doctorate in criminal justice. Dr Sulaiman Al-Fahim’s PhD is nowhere near as ironic - his qualification is in Real Estate investment.

Shinawatra’s best friend didn’t get the memo

Just a few days ago, City executive chairman Garry Cook was boasting about how Manchester City will be more popular than Coca-Cola around the world, thanks to the ten year plan of a disgraced former Thai Prime Minister. He also assured us that the Citizens were financially stable and uninterested in attracting additional investors:

“I was in Beijing last week,” began Cook, “sitting with [Thaksin Shinawatra] and the second richest man in China and other guys. They all want to be part of Manchester City. I’ve had representatives of companies from Dubai, Saudi Arabia, Kuwait on. Some of those representatives have actually phoned the supporters’ club because they couldn’t find the club number. So I get the supporters’ club secretary saying to me, ‘So the club is for sale, then, because I’ve got Anwar on the phone from Saudi Arabia?’ This club is not for sale.”

The man who wants a break-away league of 10-14 clubs obviously wasn’t kept in the loop on this one…

[Quote: The Guardian]

And the biggest transfer deal of the day is…

Things start looking good for Manchester City on the pitch, but there’s a right old kerfuffle going on behind the scenes at eastlands. According to Sky Sports, Thaksin Shinawatra agreed a deal last night to sell the club to the Abu Dhabi United Group for Development.

Dr Sulaiman Al Fahim, the chief executive of Hydra Properties, will represent the new owners on the board:

“We will release details later, but this is a great event for both the club and Abu Dhabi. Our goal is very simple - to make Manchester City the biggest club in the Premier League, and to begin with, to finish in the top four this season.”

So, just months after Shinawatra sacked Sven Goran Eriksson for failing to meet his ridiculous expectations, along comes a new owner with even tougher targets. Is this good news for Manchester City? Will Garry Cook continue to defend his favourite disgraced Thai? Let us know with a comment below.

Meet the man with huge plans for the Citizens

In ten years time, when the first words of most children in Asia are ‘Manchester City’, and all of David Beckham’s children are begging for a game at Eastlands, we’ll have one man to thank. It’s not that barmy former Thai Prime Minister with the frozen assets, but City executive chairman Garry Cook. Keep reading for ten fascinating facts about the man and his mental ambitious plans for the future of his club and the entire league…

1. Shinawatra poached him from an executive position at Nike, where he has gained marketing expertise for the past 22 years.

2. His time in the USA with Nike has clearly affected his sensibilities about sport. He believes there should be a break-away division of 10-14 clubs with no promotion or relegation. “The fans would find a way to get passionate about it,” he says.

3. He sees City becoming a global empire that will be bigger than Manchester Utd. By tapping into the Chinese and Indian markets, which represent 30 per cent of the world’s population, he believes the Blues can win the Champions League in “ten years or more”.

4. He is obsessed with the nonsense term ‘box office signing’, and is the man responsible

Former Thai PM has a semi-ironic educational past

Thaksin Shinawatra (the gentleman who broke the terms of his bail by attending the Olympics, and who is seeking in asylum in Britain in order to escape the arrest warrant issued by the Thailand Supreme Court) is often referred to as ‘Dr Thaksin Shinawatra’. This is because he received a doctorate from the Sam Houston State University in Texas in 1978. The subject of said doctorate and also his masters degree? Criminal Justice.

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Citeh’s Thai revolution takes another bizarre twist

UPDATE: Shinawatra has denied the story. You win this time, common sense.

Unassisted by useful journalistic tools like evidence and quotations, The Daily Express today are claiming that Thai nutbag Thaksin Shinawatra has put the entire Manchester City team up for sale:

Thai billionaire Shinawatra, who is already set to sack manager Sven-Goran Eriksson, is apparently so disgusted with the team’s performances in the second half of the season that he wants a massive clear-out, including young stars such as Micah Richards, Michael Johnson and Joe Hart.

If this is true, what the Gary Mabbutt is he up to? It’s no secret