The Spoiler

Aguero won’t go to Chelsea, Fulham sign Mr West Brom and Burnley make t-shirts


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Before you check out the links, here’s Britney Spears doing something or other in a bikini

Burnley are already commemorating their famous win with t-shirts
[Pies]

Sergio Aguero is a no-go for Chelsea after playing in the Champions League for Atletico Madrid
[Daily Mail]

Our new favourite website
[iamfriendswithsluts.com]

Sammy Lee charged with improper conduct
[The Guardian]

Interestment have excellent taste in football websites
[Interestment]

Jonathan Greening joins Fulham on a season-long loan
[Sky Sports]

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Posted: August 20th, 2009 by Ryan Bailey

Top ten: Former Premier League stars who now play non-League football


The players who fell from grace but refused to quit

Alan Wright and Keith Gillespie

Such is their love of the game, a number of former Premier League stars have forged managerial careers in the ever-so-slightly less glamorous world of non-League football: Luton’s Mick Harford and Newport’s Dean Holdsworth are notable examples. Some however, are still plying their trade on the pitch in the lower echelons of the football pyramid.

Spoiler correspondent Russell Greaves brings us ten former top flight heroes who have swapped the international acclaim of the top flight for the bumpy pitches and humble attendances of the grass roots game…

Paolo Vernazza
(4 Premier League appearances for Arsenal)
Once a promising youngster at Arsenal, Paolo even got a run out in the Champions League, but has since worked his way down the leagues - way down. Having scored the winning goal against Coventry City in front of 37,000 fans at Highbury in 2000, the midfielder’s most recent goal was for Conference South giants Woking, and 2,000 people were fortunate enough to see it. A cautionary tale for the current crop of Arsenal youngsters. Credit where it’s due, though, his supporting lady is top-class.

Jason Lee
(69 Premier League appearances for Nottingham Forest)
If you recognise the name, it could be because he scored over one-hundred career league goals, but it’s more likely to be because he was relentlessly lampooned on Fantasy Football League. He’s now banging them in for Corby Town in the Conference North, minus the pineapple.

Alan Wright
(Over 300 Premier League appearances for Blackburn Rovers and Aston Villa)
Perhaps best remembered as the shortest player in the history of the Premier League (a pocket-sized 5’4’’), Alan Wright is now best known as the shortest player in the Blue Square North. Aston Villa once paid £1m for his services, but Fleetwood Town recently secured his signature without a fee and gave the 38-year-old his non-league debut in a 2-1 victory at Solihull Moors.

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Posted: August 11th, 2009 by Ryan Bailey

Ronaldo accused of kicking a car window, Sheffield United show West Ham some love


A round-up of of this afternoon’s other football news

Cristiano Ronaldo

Cristiano Ronaldo gets in more car trouble
Six months after having his Ferrari 599 GTB written off after a collision with a concrete wall, Ronaldo is again in trouble for a car-related incident. The Real Madrid star allegedly used his £80 million-valued feet to kick the car window of 17-year-old student Sara Pardal, sending shards of glass flying into her face. The FIFA World Player of the Year was heading to an Elton John concert with his mum and sisters when he spotted the girl videoing him. Ronaldo claims she was with a photographer who had been stationed outside his house for days and that he only reacted because his mother was distressed. He has expressed regret but also accused Pardal of exaggerating her injuries.

Sheffield United try to build bridges with West Ham
The Blades completed the signing of former West Ham winger Kyel Reid today and have used the move as proof that there are no hard feelings between them

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Posted: July 1st, 2009 by Michael Lintorn

Spurs finally start the season at home but must face Liverpool


A chance to get excited months before anything actually happens

Robbie Keane will again face his former teammates on the opening day

Tottenham have finally been granted their wish to kick-off a Premier League campaign at home but Liverpool will be the visitors for their first opener at White Hart Lane since 2004.

Spurs fans can take some comfort though from the fact Arsenal have been given a challenging away game on the opening weekend against Everton.

Wolves are the only promoted side who start at home - against West Ham - and the last five to have done so have avoided defeat. Every new arrival who has opened their campaign on the road over the last three seasons has lost and Birmingham and Burnley face tough trips to Man United and Stoke.

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Posted: June 17th, 2009 by Michael Lintorn

Mourinho is staying with Inter, Newcastle are labelled rubbish


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In case you missed it - Phil Brown celebrates guiding Hull to the second-worst surviving Premier League points haul of all time with a song
Jose Mourinho signs a new contract to stay with Inter until June 2012
[The Guardian]

Former owner John Hall states the obvious by calling Newcastle “rubbish”
[Sky Sports]

Berbatov says he’s not lazy, he’s just so good that everything looks effortless
[Daily Mail]

Leeds put Jermaine Beckford on the transfer list after he rejects a new deal
[BBC]

West Brom fans wear masks to pay tribute to Celtic target Tony Mowbray
[Off The Post]

Six Premier League players who faded badly as the season progressed
[Pies]

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Posted: May 26th, 2009 by Michael Lintorn

Alan Shearer is staying, Man United want Franck Ribery and Celtic consider Tony Mowbray


The latest transfer gossip, rumours and damned lies…

Alan Shearer

Alan Shearer will be offered a four-year contract
Joe Kinnear’s favourite journalist Simon Bird is reporting that Mike Ashley wants Alan Shearer to sign a four-year contract. The Geordie Messiah failed to pick up the six points from eight games needed to survive yet is still viewed as the ideal man to bring Newcastle back to the Premier League.

The Spoiler truth-o-meter: Ashley has pretty much botched every major decision he has had to make so it’s no surprise that he is willing to give an unproven manager a long-term deal just to appease the fans.

Franck Ribery to Manchester United
Patrice Evra has described his international teammate Franck Ribery as “the

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Posted: May 26th, 2009 by Michael Lintorn

Video: Wade Elliott’s wonder goal earns Burnley promotion


Another claret-and-blue team break Sheffield United’s hearts

Sheffield United chairman Kevin McCabe laughably claimed before the Championship play-off final that they would be a top-half Premier League side now were it not for only picking up 38 points in 2006-07 Carlos Tevez.

However, Burnley were the team who showed top-flight quality at Wembley and deservedly won with a brilliant 13th minute goal by Wade Elliott. Having beaten Fulham, Arsenal, Chelsea, Tottenham and West Brom this season and seen Sunderland and Hull stay up despite being dreadful, Owen Coyle should be confident that the Clarets can survive their first Premier League campaign.

Kevin Blackwell, as you would expect of a former assistant of Neil Warnock, struggled to be gracious in defeat and insinuated that Mike Dean’s performance

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Posted: May 26th, 2009 by Michael Lintorn

Wigan are the best value for money in the Premiership


Latics fans get their money’s worth

Wigan fans


Dave Whelan
might be a bit of an egomaniac and have an unhealthy obsession with Sir Alex, but he definitely knows how to give supporters value for money. Attention-seeking research by ING Direct has revealed Wigan fans have most reason to smile ‘in the current climate’ after paying out a relative pittance on season tickets to see their team triumph (well, they were fighting for 7th until a few weeks ago) in the Premiership.

Second in the value league are Blackburn, who charge just £200 for their cheaper annual passes. In contrast, some Spurs fans will have shelled out near to £2k for the privilege of watching their beloved team being given a shoeing by Hull, Stoke and West Brom at various points in the season.

Has your team’s performance been worth your hard earned coin this season? Thoughts below and see the list after the jump…

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Posted: May 22nd, 2009 by Richard Gilzene