ABSOLUTELY FOUL NEWS

Ronaldo plays Guess Who? Brazilian feet edition

Like something out of a Victorian medical journal

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Feet are the tools of a footballers trade, and like any tools, they eventually get worn and a bit manky.

Fortunately, the average football fan doesn’t get to see the result of thousands of hours spent kicking a piece of leather [...]

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Special Effects

A zany video of Fat Ronaldo throughout the years

The changing faces of Ronaldo

Here at The Spoiler technology is king. So, as you can probably imagine, there are nifty little gadgets and terrifying gizmos all over the place. Even [...]

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"FATTY FAT-FAT"

(Fat) Ronaldo: “I’m fat”

O Fenômeno’s weight-related epiphany is three years overdue…

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Since returning to Brazil after pies and feeble knee cartilage called time on a 14-year European career, Original Ronaldo has been enjoying his football. He’s racked up 19 goals in 25 games for Corinthians so far, bagging a league title and [...]

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CR9 UPDATE

Cristiano Ronaldo threatened with injury by voodoo priest

Sorcerer is currently making anti-CRon spell in his ‘laboratory’

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The ever-mental Spanish sports papers have excelled themselves once more, with news reaching us from El Mundo that Real Madrid is under siege by an anonymous voodoo priest.

A letter has been received by the club from a man [...]

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