Spoiler

Oh no, Maradona’s talking about taking his clothes off

Imagine this man, but totally naked

Nine times out of ten, if someone tells you that they will do something humiliating if their team wins, you can be pretty sure that when it comes to the crunch, they just won’t do it. They will make a sudden [...]

Get the Rio Ferdinand look, and sexy Brazil fans go wild!

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Brazil fans. Now compare them in your head with England fans

Football’s greatest Clegg-Camerons

[Daily Mail]

Hmm, the French aren’t [...]

World Cup Profile: Argentina

At least two of these men will play… probably

From now until the first ball is kicked at the World Cup, The Spoiler shall endeavour to profile each and every nation taking part in the competition. Not just to study their form, but to find out who these people [...]

Neville and Scholes, and other kissing footballers

“Shhhh”

Fans of movies about the mob will tell you that sometimes one man can kiss another man, and it’s not in any way girly/gay. If anything, it’s actually quite macho, and it goes some way to proving that there’s really nothing particularly eyebrow-raising about two straight [...]

Pele doesn’t think Messi’s as good as everyone else does

Pele – still the best… according to Pele

For all that was wonderful about Pele – the goals, the sublime skills, the curious erection adverts, Escape to Victory - when it comes to passing on his World’s Greatest crown to a younger man, he has serious issues. What some [...]

The Spoiler’s very tiny footballer XI

Including one of these chaps

If you think that height equates to success, then you are very wrong indeed. Look at Tom Cruise – he’s as small as a pigeon. Or Al Pacino – barely bigger than a packet of Embassy Filters (probably the dinkiest cigarette on the market). [...]

Hungry dog attempts to eat Maradona’s face!

A terrifying recreation

It’s easy to forget that deep down, dogs are just wild animals. They have all of the same attributes as the lone wolves that prowl through wastelands hunting for prey – fangs, weird claws/feet, fur, massive drooling tongues. And yet most of the time they seem so sweet.

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Messi is better than Maradona, insists Pedro Rodriguez

Is one of these men the greatest ever?

In all walks of life, people are chasing ghosts. Artists will have bled to death with a still-throbbing ear draped from their paint-stained fingers in a bid to be more like Van Gogh. Houses will have been [...]