Spoiler

FIFA reckon England are better than Brazil and Portugal…

And Argentina and Mexico…

Fancy seeing some photos of Huntelaar and Kuyt on the pull?

Whaddya mean ‘no’? The Human Centipede II looks pretty good, don’t it? For those of you who haven’t heard, it’s a completely disgusting film with loads of really sick imagery and horrible sexual violence starring Matthew McConaughey and Jennifer Aniston.

Sadly you can’t see it because it’s been banned. [...]

Former Dutch international does a nice bit of skill

Sick skillz…

Here’s Gerald [...]

Kallstrom shows Kuyt how to do it, Gary Cahill is worth more than two Rafael van der Vaarts

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DIRK, NANI, TAKE NOTE. [via 101GG]

Rooney contract needs sorting [The Sun]

’90s England turn up in ex-footballer’s music vid. Mute buttons at the ready! [

Dirk Kuyt out for four weeks after Nani-esque ‘training ground bicycle kick’ injury

Lovable carthorse has mishap that kept Not-Ronaldo out of WC’10

Dirk Kuyt has officially been ruled out for action for the next month, having busted his shoulder attempting a bicycle kick in training with Holland.

The red-faced 30-year-old returned to Liverpool yesterday to undergo scans, with club doctor Peter [...]

Arjen Robben: Internet star

It all started with this…

Fresh from registering their pixel-based horror at Robinho’s ‘Beardgate‘ fiasco, take a look at what the Interwebz’ Photoshop goons have done with the above shot of Arjen Robben post-dive…

Nike give Dutch the kiss of death, Celtic kits stolen and psychic octopus in scandal

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Nike get behind the Netherlands, have probably hexed them forever

Paul the psychic octopus caught up in fraud SCANDAL [Deadspin]

Celtic kits nicked en route to Parkhead [...]

World Cup virgins, Dutch team are banned from Twitter and Fabio Capello gets strict(er)

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Tim Cahill, Lucre Neill and compatriots play a pick-up game with the local wildlife [via 101GG]

Let’s all go to Tescos, where Jonas buys his best clothes! La-la [...]