Spoiler

The Spoiler’s Summer Awards – Part One

And the award for most unnecessary caps in a headline goes to…

Apologies once again for the lack of activity on The Spoiler this summer. To compensate – or punish further, depending on your view – we’ve crammed about seven stories [...]

Arsenal welcome 15-year-old defender, Toon players in trouble, football’s top earners

Also appearing on a computer near you…

When celebrations turn ‘painful’ [OTP]

Arsenal sign 15-year-old German defender [Mirror]

Stuart Holden chucks his footballer’s diet straight out the window at the earliest opportunity [

Liverpool bid £30million for Newcastle’s Andy Carroll

… putting two and two together, that’ll be Torres in Blue.

Mike Ashley throws a load of money out of the window

As reported in today’s Sun, Ashley’s two hour trip to a local casino was as inspiring as usual. In the words of “a source”:

“It was incredible. He lost a million quid in not much longer than it takes to play a football match but still left with a smile on his face.”   

Robin Van Persie linked with Real Madrid move…

A couple of bog standard lesbians

And lo, 19 years ago, Jonathan Ross held in his arms a little baby lesbian with the usual short hair and no make up. She has since grown up to be more the lipstick variety, with Ross outing her to the world on Gaydar Radio [...]

Tottenham Hotspur’s revolving door has trouble spinning

Gervais – lovable

Depending on how you take your cocktails, you will either have spent yesterday evening watching MOTD2 (just ice), or gearing up for the Golden Globes (in a pineapple). For those who like it with no frills, here are the highlights: Helena Bonham Carter turned up in mismatching [...]

Tottenham’s Andy Carroll bid seriously loses momentum…

Hark! A Kara Tointon dancing montage!

Regardless of the whooping gaydars going off throughout Strictly Come Dancing, the big news from today’s showbusiness desks is that should-be-WAG Kara Tointon has fallen head over heels in love with a ballroom dancer. Take a sobering moment – [...]

Liverpool’s 2011 transfer wish list, and Blackburn hilarity!

Those still curious about what life entails for The Spoiler when not writing very liberally around the subject of football, yesterday afternoon was spent hemorrhaging money on afternoon tea in the swishy London hotel Claridges – a rare treat, so rare that it had never happened before. How posh we all felt, eating little crustless sandwiches, [...]