Transfer Talk

Carvalho’s off to Real Madrid, plus Arsenal man to Spurs

Bezzie mates

Mourinho and Carvalho 

The only noise of note coming from Manchester today is the soft Welsh lilt of Craig Bellamy’s voice as he discusses his future with himself in the mirror – presumably in the manner of Ben Kingsley’s Don Logan in Sexy Beast.

“You gonna quit, [...]

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Transfer Talk

Crouchie back to Liverpool, United to hijack Milner…

Um, something about “taking the plunge”?

Peter Crouch 

Of course, the big news today is that Paul Robinson and Wes Brown have opted to watch England matches just like the rest of us, wisely choosing a big TV/comfy sofa combo over an uncomfortable pitch side seat in an overcrowded [...]

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Transfer Talk

The Saturdays, Karim Benzema for Ashley Cole, and…

Blue Top, Almost Ginger, Blondie, Tall One, and Frankie…

The Saturdays 

Just in case you were wondering, Frankie from The Saturdays is definitely not going out with Ashley Cole. Yes, they sometimes hang out at the same cool bars, like China Whites or Movida, but she’s totally in love [...]

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Transfer Talk

More transfer window movement from Man City

Mr Flashy wants loads more money, please


That’s “movement” in the very broadest sense of the word. The same sense that finds old women hunched over with their noses mere centimetres from the ground travelling from A to B at around a thirtieth of normal human velocity.

No. This [...]

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Transfer Update

Khedira signs for Real Madrid, Ozil keeps schtum

Lucky Khedira meets Chris de Burgh


After a week of pretty much sod all, the silky net curtains that drape down in front of the transfer window have been splattered with sweat and little bits of hair gel, as Sami Khedira has tumbled through and been ushered off to [...]

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Transfer Talk

Henry Redknapp resorts to bartering for Ashley Young

Three players offered in exchange for this chap…

Ashley Young

In the olden days, before someone invented money from old bits of scrap paper, a glass of Ribena might cost you half a melon, and a Cheryl Cole would set you back either four Jordans, 27 Kerry Katonas, or the head of [...]

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